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(37 Posts)
helenlouisey Mon 07-Jul-14 20:06:28

Does anyone know much about this website? I went away for the night last weekend and just seen an email in my hubby's deleted email box titled 'activate your account on Naughtydate!'

Now usually I would have thought this was just spam however looked at the email and in it it has his email address and his password listed and it's the password he generally uses for websites / Facebook etc. there's no way the website could have known this unless he'd put it in himself?

I tried to log on but it looks like he didn't go through and activate the account, maybe he had second thoughts who knows, but looks like he did sign up in the first place!

What should I do ?????


FolkGirl Mon 07-Jul-14 21:17:58

I hope it turns out that it was just spam, helen.

It's so much harder to know what to do when there is a element of doubt sad

FolkGirl Mon 07-Jul-14 21:18:47

Me too!!

helenlouisey Mon 07-Jul-14 21:21:52

He's definitely been on the website - when I put his email
Address and password in the website it says your accounts not been activated, I tried putting my email address and random password it comes up with an error message saying 'the login details you've entered are incorrect'

rosepetalsoup Mon 07-Jul-14 21:23:57

If it was me I'd just ask him. You know him well enough to judge his reaction.

OP why were you looking in his deleted email box? Did you already mistrust him?

helenlouisey Mon 07-Jul-14 21:24:59

Yes sadly I do distrust him, he came close to having an affair two years ago so am highly suspicious of him.

MillyDots Mon 07-Jul-14 21:28:20

I understand you not wanting to throw away 20 years but he is doing just that now isn't he and he did it when he was going to have an affair years ago. How do you know what he has done in between when you havnt accidentally seen anything.

FolkGirl Mon 07-Jul-14 22:18:19

Well in that case, it depends. Is this Game Over for you?

It would be for me. I'm not really one of the LTB lot. I wouldn't tell someone else what to do, but I can tell you what I would do (and I have done), because I did it.

helenlouisey Mon 07-Jul-14 22:29:41

Confronted him he completely denies going onto the website, said it was spam, I explained that usually spam doesn't contain your email address and password and what a coincidence it happened the night I was away at 10 pm. He was very calm and we left it that I told him I wasn't stupid and didn't believe him and I've gone to bed. No idea what's going to happen now or how I feel. My guy reaction is he went nosing round these websites while I wasn't there to see what was about. I don't believe he's never been on the website. What I've got to decide is whether this is it, whether I've had enough or whether I just suck it up and get on with it. Don't even know who to speak to about it in real life, someone who actually knows us both and can put a personal perspective on things. Thanks for everyone's advise and support tonight x

FolkGirl Mon 07-Jul-14 22:43:49

I wouldn't suck it up, but then you're not me.

I hope you find a peaceful (for you) resolution to this flowers

magoria Mon 07-Jul-14 22:45:47

My guess (and it is just a guess) is that he was looking for something and planning on joining this website but when it got to the you need to pay up £ he decided to find somewhere that didn't charge.

Hence the lack of activation.

Cabrinha Mon 07-Jul-14 22:58:41

You know all these spam things and clever computers signing men up to sex sites?

I see this almost daily on here.

Not once have I seen a woman post "hey folks - weird shit, anyone know how I've been signed up for naughty date / adultwork / fuckbuddy etc etc etc

Seriously - always the husband, never the wife.

Tells you something, no?

I will declare a conflict of interest: my STBXH was a fan of such sites and such "don't know how it happened" bollocks - mostly prostitute sites.

He's the type no-one would believe it of too. I left, eventually.
I have evidence that he's already using prostitutes behind his new gf's back.

Personally, I found the constant need to check the deleted items box, and being treated like a fool, was destroying me in a worse way than the actual cheating.

I'm sorry sad

kaykayblue Tue 08-Jul-14 10:10:19

I'm sorry OP. Your partner's reaction is pretty pathetic to be honest. Considering how he already pushed the limits of your trust a couple of years back, you'd think he would be dead keen to prove to you that he hasn't done that again.

Websites don't register you on their sites - they can send spam, but they can't actively register you and then send a confirmation e-mail with your username and password!!

Maybe he thinks he has a clear conscience because he didn't go through with it (deleted items), so he feels that lying is acceptable in this instance.

I don't know what to suggest OP, but I'm sorry.

I won't say LTB based on this, but if you have no trust left in him, and he is not being honest with this relationship going anywhere?

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