I've never posted before, so hope I am doing it right. And hope it is ok too ask this question.
Is it always rape if you say no and they carry on? I can't believe I am actually going to type this. I had gone to bed to sleep and my husband was already in bed, asleep, or so thought. As soon as I got into bed it was clear he was no longer interested in sleep. I decided to go along with it for a bit to keep the peace. (He has in the past guilted me into sex by saing I obviously don't love him etc or ignored my polite attempts at saying no and removing his hands). I was hoping a quick kiss and a cuddle would satisfy him that I still loved him and found him attractive then I would be able to go to sleep. He suddenly started to climb on top of me and I began to panic as I am terrified of getting pregnant again as it is potentially dangerous for me as I was very unwell during my last pregnancy. I immediately said 'no' but he didn't respond so I asked him to get a condom. He still didn't react so I started to say 'no, please, no...' By now he was on top of me and as I was still saying this he pushed my legs apart and started to have sex with me. I immediately fell silent as I was in complete shock. I never imagined he would ever carry on if I had said 'no'. But because I thought he would stop I didn't try to push him off me, i thought 'no' was enough.
I am very ashamed of this next part. He didn't finish, he pulled out and then one of us got a condom and be then continued till he had finished. It may well have been me that got the condom. I was in a state of shock and confusion and thought it just didn't matter anymore as he had done the one thing I didn't want him to do. I don't remember that part so clearly. I didn't understand what had just happened and I guess I still don't. Did he rape me? Or is it not a big deal and I should just forget about it?
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Did my husband rape me? So confused and ashamed to be asking
74 replies
bootwentytwo2 · 27/06/2014 20:29
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