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Do I text his family or Not!!

(42 Posts)
10152530 Mon 16-Jun-14 22:35:37

Been married for 17 years full of misery and sadness. My husband (separated but still cohabiting..), keeps saying in an indirect way that his family don't like me, they criticise the way I call his name, the ones who don't come around to visit don't because of me...
this is the text I am about to send them all:
Shall I do or not!!!
Thank you

It's very hurtful to be told by Mr that I am not being liked by his family, that none of you like to visit us and that comments on how I call him "honey" have been going around.
I have always considered every one of you as a member of my family. when you come to visit, I try my best to give you beyond a 5 star service offering everything I can from my heart, and when I visit you, I do it to enjoy your company and for our kids to get to spend good times as cousins no more...! But it seems like whether in my house or at yours, I am being watched, judged & criticised...
I know that what Mr says is not always true & that he tends to twist what's been said around to show that I am the guilty & bad one and that you all have issues with me but there is no smoke without fire..,!
God is great & nothing goes by without him seeing the true from the false, the cheater from the honest one...!
I am in no way a bad person nor an angel but you don't seem to see the emotional damage & abuse Mr has done to me, you only seem to see him as perfect as an angel.
from now on, I will keep my distance to avoid being judged, criticised and hurt as I can no longer put up with the stress this has caused me.
Good bye everyone.

heavenstobetsy Mon 16-Jun-14 22:37:43

No, don't send it. No good will come of it.

ohldoneedtogetagrip Mon 16-Jun-14 22:39:20

no please don't send it-they will just think you are a loon and that Mr was corect.
Much better to keep a dignified silence

BlackeyedSusan Mon 16-Jun-14 22:39:26

you have only his word for it that they are upset. After a breakup they will either be supportive, or more likely they are going to side with their relative, texting them is not going to achieve much. you will not change their minds.

Emma1109 Mon 16-Jun-14 22:39:28

Aw not a great situation to be in. If you feel in your heart that you would get some comfort out if saying this then by all means. If it's just scoring points with mr then I would say you won't feel any benefit. The only bit I would take out is the goodbye everyone at the end. Seems a wee bit dramatic and I wouldn't want to invite them to criticise more "such dramatics etc etc)

ImperialBlether Mon 16-Jun-14 22:39:45

No, don't send it. Put your energy into getting rid of him. Write as much as you like in a password protected Word document, but don't communicate with them for one second more.

HauntedNoddyCar Mon 16-Jun-14 22:40:11

No don't send it. It won't end like youhope.

Lifeisforlivingkatie Mon 16-Jun-14 22:41:01

Are you married or cohabiting? No don't send it, don't invite them, instead spend time with your own friends and family

WhotheWhat Mon 16-Jun-14 22:41:35

No. That way madness lies. Detach.

cozietoesie Mon 16-Jun-14 22:41:46

No, don't send it. Keep your distance right now.

What's happening about the 'still cohabiting' ? That is such a difficult situation that you'll want to resolve it quickly I think.

angryangryyoungwoman Mon 16-Jun-14 22:42:14

No, don't send it. Just don't provide them with a five star service any more. That is of course if you believe what your husband says that they are saying

JustSquirted Mon 16-Jun-14 22:44:47

No don't send it. Maybe they don't come round don't like the way he treats you?

BrianTheMole Mon 16-Jun-14 22:45:12

Don't send it op. Honestly, it will make you feel worse if you do.

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 16-Jun-14 22:47:11

No. Delete and move on knowing you will one day be rid and they won't.

TeamEdward Mon 16-Jun-14 22:50:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Onesleeptillwembley Mon 16-Jun-14 22:55:39

You'll sound a complete twat. Especially with the ridiculous comments about god.

Fideliney Mon 16-Jun-14 22:59:12


Hissy Mon 16-Jun-14 23:01:38

You are good enough for you. That is all that matters.

Don't send the message, it is coming over as completely bonkers. I utterly agree with OneSleep.

Move on with your life and promise yourself that you'll cram whatever happiness you can find into your life to make up for the misery you've suffered.

Needadvice5 Mon 16-Jun-14 23:04:20

No deffo don't send, he's probably just saying unkind things to try and cause problems!

avocadogreen Mon 16-Jun-14 23:06:45

I think you need to forget about the family and concentrate on kicking the wanker out! Why are you still living together? Get rid of him.and you'll never have to see the family again.

Lovingfreedom Mon 16-Jun-14 23:12:33

Another vote for not sending way

PetyrBaelishsConscience Mon 16-Jun-14 23:14:37

Don't send it. Whatever you hope will happen when they read it won't happen. You'll just open up another can of worms.

Kleptronic Mon 16-Jun-14 23:17:13

Don't send it, because:
1) you don't know if he's lying
2) if he isn't, then these people are not reasonable, and your message will only be grist to their mill
3) detaching from him and them is the best way forward for you to get out of this and move forwards in your life

I think he's probably winding you up, and it's working. Either way I think it'd be better if you weren't cohabiting and you had some space to deal with things.

bloodyteenagers Mon 16-Jun-14 23:23:39

Why would you want to send this?
You only have his word for this. He sounds like an arse that is incapable of telling the truth even if it smacked him in the face. Why would you believe anything that spews from him?

Move on. Kick his arse out. Get on with your life.

You know what. Even if this is what they think. And? People are allowed to like who they like. They are allowed to have opinions of their own.

mrssmith79 Mon 16-Jun-14 23:26:43

Please don't! It'll only be fodder for them. Let alone the cost of sending a text that size to multiple people! I do hope you're on a generous priceplan! wink

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