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Why do exes pop up like meerkats?! Ignore???

(12 Posts)
Sunset89 Fri 06-Jun-14 17:39:19

9 months ago I broke up with my ex boyfriend - we ended on bad terms after he left me to get back with his ex gf (he had dumped her in the first place as he said they were more like friends) but from what I can gather she never gave him that second chance

It was literally like been dropped off a cliff- from being completely besotted by me (gifts, weekends away, future plans- even gazing into my eyes) to ending it completely out the blue and been very cold and unsympathetic at the end of the breakup- to make matters worse 2 months after the breakup I saw he was on tinder looking for a 'nice girl' I messaged him showing my disapproval (he told me he needed space to get over his ex so I felt like this didn't reflect that) but after this I chose to do the standard cut him out my life!

I know he's bumped into my friends on two occasions and each time he hasn't been able to look at them in their faces and looked away really quickly looking very awkward! He was also caught looking in where I worked on one occasion a few months after the bu and had the cheek to text my best friend saying he hoped they were still on good terms as he always enjoyed going out with her and her bf and it was 'weird how things ended' with us two...

Anyway recently completely out of the blue he text me asking me if I was at a shopping centre two days before as he thought he had seen me- he then asked me how I was...... It was like nothing had happened and I was shocked at his casual attitude like he thought I would reply when he knew how much he had hurt me! I had deleted his number a long time ago so was surprised he still had my number!

Just wondered why exes pop up like this!!! Why do you think he chose to start a conversation with me so casually???? I chose to ignore the message and never responded- do you think I did the right thing?! I feel harsh but I don't want to be a door mat and I really do feel his behaviour was quite shocking!

Thank you for reading


SquallyShowers Fri 06-Jun-14 17:41:26

He sounds like a creepy prick. Ignore!

AcrossthePond55 Fri 06-Jun-14 17:44:36

Possibly full of regrets & trying to start fanning a 'new flame? Pfft.

I'd ignore. If he did you dirty once, he'll do you dirty twice.

Jan45 Fri 06-Jun-14 17:46:34

didn't work out with his previous, he's bored, thinks he can pick up where he dropped you off, IGNORE.

Smilesandpiles Fri 06-Jun-14 18:08:17

^ ^


Softlysoftlycatchymonkey Fri 06-Jun-14 18:11:04

He feels entitled to.

Sunset89 Fri 06-Jun-14 18:14:08

Thanks for your replies!

It was weird before he turned into an absolute pr**k and ended it out the blue he treated like gold and seemed genuinely happy!

Just hard to work out whether he regrets what he did to me- still has feelings or whether it's guilt talking or boredom! He's a very attractive guy so I don't even think he would be short of female attention! Guess 9 months later he must still be single so obviously didn't find that 'nice girl' on tinder as he was looking for.... ( that's a shame )


Sunset89 Fri 06-Jun-14 18:15:55

Softly... Sorry what do you mean by entitled too?.... I never saw him when he had seen me so I don't even feel like he had to do it out of politeness!

Smilesandpiles Fri 06-Jun-14 18:17:10

It's boredom.

He doesn't give a toss. You are a shag and ego boost and that's all you'll be to him.

In short, he's a using prick, a coward, doesn't know what he wants really.

He can't find anyone on Tinder so he's going back to try his luck with past ones.

Once he's got the message that you are not playing ball, he'll go to another one. Just watch.

EVentually, he'll go back to the last one he dumped and "try to make it work".

superstarheartbreaker Fri 06-Jun-14 18:35:57

I think what softly means by ' entitled too' is that this 'man' sees it his god given right to treat women like sexual playthings and cannot understand how anyone could have an opinion on being treated thus. Largely because he sees women as put here on earth for his pleasure and inferior to men.

Sunset89 Fri 06-Jun-14 18:44:54

And here's me thinking maybe he realised what an idiot he was and regretted treating me so bad when I was a good gf ..... Sob sob sob where's the wine?!?!!! Haha

He was with his ex for 5 years before me and broke up with her only weeks before we had met.... Not sure if this changes anything but guessing I meant he doesn't really have a history of using girls for sex as I was his second!

I know I shouldn't care why he messaged me, but us girls like to know everything hey!

Delphinegreen Fri 06-Jun-14 18:52:58

Yup ignore......completely. It's hard because you are trying to make sense of his behaviour. He just sounds like a self centred dick.

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