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Oh Shit…. DH not talking to me!

(44 Posts)
rattlesnake Fri 06-Jun-14 09:23:25

This is sooo stupid..but anyway, bit of background. Last year I put a GPS tracker on DH's car, due to neighbours being stolen. Thought it was a good safety gadget to have. I occasionally check it, just out of curiosity, but last night it said car had been somewhere totally out of the way..from work / home! So when DH came home I asked him why he had to go to such and such place. He said he didn't know what I was talking about. I started a row, saying he was a liar…(why would GPS be wrong??) He slept in one room, I in the other. Breakfast in silence. Then later this morning I checked the GPS again and it said car had been in some obscure place…when it was clearly in driveway all night!! Oops! I have texted my apologies…but he is really pissed off that I don't trust him! Technology does fail I guess… and I have to do some serious creeping now.

dollius Fri 06-Jun-14 09:25:36

How do you know he didn't go out again when you were asleep?


Chocotrekkie Fri 06-Jun-14 09:26:18

I would be seriously pissed off if I was your DH too.

Did he know about the tracker ?

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 06-Jun-14 09:28:36

You texted an apology??? How sincere.... hmm

JamNan Fri 06-Jun-14 09:29:35

with dollius on that one!

TantrumsAndBalloons Fri 06-Jun-14 09:31:07

Did he know there was a tracker on his car?

Fontella Fri 06-Jun-14 09:31:24

Cog! grin

rattlesnake Fri 06-Jun-14 09:32:29

He did know about tracker when we put it in, yes… but I think he'd forgotten about it. smile I don't think he went out again… I would have heard. My apology was sincere, and I suppose he's entitled to sulk now!!

rattlesnake Fri 06-Jun-14 09:34:11

I can't call…it's not convenient due to nature of his work… I had to just text!

MissFruits Fri 06-Jun-14 09:44:20

If my DP was checking my whereabouts without my knowledge I would be furious. Why would you be secretly be checking up on him if you trust him?

NotNewButNameChanged Fri 06-Jun-14 09:46:36

I'd be seriously pissed off too. Some very serious making up to do on this one, methinks.

rattlesnake Fri 06-Jun-14 09:48:31

I wasn't really checking on his whereabouts ( I think!) Just happened to check GPS… which I will be binning! I'm in the wrong, I know, I feel like a tw@ !

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 06-Jun-14 09:52:17

Then you're going to have to eat some serious crow for a while. I hope he's taken the spy thing off the car now.

AgentProvocateur Fri 06-Jun-14 09:56:01

If my DP was checking up on my whereabouts and then falsely accusing me of being places where I wasn't, I'd probably walk out.

Onesleeptillwembley Fri 06-Jun-14 09:59:08

I'm guessing your marriage is already in a the state if you're checking up on him like this. I don't blame him fm for being angry. I would too. Not just the accusation but the mistrust and stalker ish behaviour. It's not a relationship I'd stay in.

FuckyNell Fri 06-Jun-14 09:59:30

I use find my iPhone to know when to leave to pick up DH from the station. Sometimes it informs me he's somewhere else entirely, even though it's impossible.

Onesleeptillwembley Fri 06-Jun-14 09:59:45

The = shit. In a shit state. Phone auto corrects v

neiljames77 Fri 06-Jun-14 10:17:22

I agree with AgentProvovateur. I'd leave.

whatdoesittake48 Fri 06-Jun-14 10:45:27

I don't see anything wrong with checking the gps (as you both know it is there), but to then accuse him of lying is the unforgivable part. I have been on the end of this type of behaviour and to be honest it drives you away.

His reaction is understandable and you need to discuss your trust issues and get to the bottom of why they exist.

A promise to talk it through might be enough - but i would also be promising to get counselling to find out why you went off the deep end.

Unless he has form for cheating or telling lies to you?

TheSarcasticFringehead Fri 06-Jun-14 10:53:32

Tbh, if someone accused me of lying and checked up on me the way you did, I'd leave.

rattlesnake Fri 06-Jun-14 10:58:01

TBH..the very last time I did check up on him..which was looking at history on his PC, it was packed full of juicy porn. When I asked him about it, he swore blind it wasn't true, until I showed him how I found it. (this was over year ago) so, a little history of lying there.

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone Fri 06-Jun-14 11:02:43

Well, then you remind him about the nasty little porn stash and simply say - that's the problem with being a liar, no, you don't tend to get people blindly trusting you (shrug). And don't apologise.

neiljames77 Fri 06-Jun-14 11:04:41

I think I can understand why you accused him. We put our trust in technology because it doesn't have any motives, it just reports information. We've all heard stories about satnavs directing people to the moon when they only wanted to go to Cornwall.

TenMinutesEarly Fri 06-Jun-14 11:07:10

I can't understand why he thought it was such a big deal unless he has something to hide.

NotNewButNameChanged Fri 06-Jun-14 11:15:48

Ten - really? Your partner wants to know where you were, you deny it, it escalates into a flaming row and you know damn well you weren't where they accuse you of being, they refuse to believe you and start calling you a liar and you wouldn't think it a big deal????

(the porn stuff aside)

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