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Realising it's over...

(6 Posts)
TwittyMcTwitterson Sun 30-Mar-14 11:04:22

So I was brave enough to LTB but due to financial reasons (mortgage) and for DD we have to live together.

We are both ok with that tbh as we were friends for a long time first and have been living as friends for a long time before we called time.

We've told no one. Well he may have but I can't bring myself to. I don't want their pity or their 'I knew it wouldn't last once you had DD looks'
I know that's stupid.

Anyway, last night he stayed out at a family members and I got this horrible crushing feeling and realised that's what it will be like once we get finances sorted and DD constantly begging for daddy. It's horrible.

I can't put up with him as he was and I won't but it's so very sad.

I don't really know what the point of this post was because I don't need advice as such and I'm handling it well but I think I just needed to get it out there. Sorry

Gretagumbo Sun 30-Mar-14 11:18:44

I think it's easier when you've all got used to the change - seperate houses. At the moment you're in a kind of limbo waiting for the final split. When you do you can then build a more positive single lifestyle. I don't mean dating but learning to enjoy life as it will be. Your daughter will need some time to adapt but she will be fine.
I know what you mean about pitying looks, I still get a bit sensitive to that 9 months on ( I call it the patronising head tilt usually complete with sad face). But it is one of those situations where I've found my true friends.
Routine and mini things to look forward to helped me. I have my own date night! I watch a film, chocolate & wine. It is tempting to sink into the mire at times but planning nice stuff helps.
It does take time x

Ifyoubuildit Sun 30-Mar-14 11:22:27

Totally understandable OP, take each day as it comes and keep posting here. Loads of lovely people with some great advice.

TwittyMcTwitterson Sun 30-Mar-14 14:03:30

Thanks guys. Wasn't expecting any replies.

He's back now and it's back to the strange norm. I'll tell someone at some point... hmm

DumbleDee Sun 30-Mar-14 14:21:12

Did this with my ex. Please take care. It was "mutual" split but it didn't stop him hacking my PC and stealing my stuff. He moved out one day when I was away overnight with work and took loads of my things with him.

Apart from that crap I felt about 10 stone lighter the day after he'd gone.

TwittyMcTwitterson Sun 30-Mar-14 15:29:51

Oh dear dumble! I agree, you never fully know what's going through their head so I am nervous at times but I do trust him grin

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