Feeling really stupid and could do with outside perspective. I am married with one DS who is in reception class. The teacher is new, same age as me and is very attractive. I have been going through a lot of family stress lately and found myself absent mindedly looking at him (I thought surreptitiously) when at school during the autumn term as he is so easy on the eye. He is not naturally chatty with the parents so I haven't had a lot to do with him face to face but I do have to go into the classroom twice a day to drop/pick up DS - it is a very small school.
Thing is, he has clearly noticed as he now smirks at me when I come over to chat v briefly about DS things (which I don't do very often as embarrassed to talk to him and am naturally shy). Most of the time now I try to avoid all contact with him/avoid looking at him as am aware I keep looking over if don't keep self in check. I am aware I sound like a complete creep and if this was a man posting we'd be thinking 'weirdo'. I am not standing there in my anorak rubbing my thighs old man style! I focus now on talking to friends and keeping some dignity! He does occasionally also flash me a large Cheshire cat grin when we talk face to face and it was after the 3rd time of him doing this I realised he knew that I'd been checking him out.
I am so mortified, feel like I am going to be the talk of the staff room and that he is laughing at me. I'm not unattractive (but a bit scruffy) but can't help feeling that he is laughing at me for even considering that the admiration might be reciprocal - which I haven't intended anyway it's all seemed to have come out of nowhere. He has a girlfriend and I imagine they are laughing about me too.
Feel embarrassed I have done this and upset that someone has noticed as am very committed to DH - who is lovely btw. I don't need this on top of a lot of family illness.
I just want things to back track and for me not to feel like a twat at school. I have been worrying about this in the wee small hours so pls be gentle. Just need some neutral perspective and maybe advice on how to make this go away.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Am I a laughing stock?
Bricomarche · 29/03/2014 16:23
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.