2 years of complete no contact and investing in my marriage and I feel very much in love with DH I didnt ever think it would be possible to get back to anything like this but I do not think that I can continue. I had an affair which DH doesnt know about. This was three years ago and the more that I have invested in him and my marriage the more that I come to believe that I cannot continue without telling him the truth. I think it is because I have so much love for him and can see him again after feeling numb to him for so long that I just dont think I can continue to deceive him about what went on. I have been a lapsed catholic for years but have been attending mass for the last year or so and I dont know if it is that which is fuelling my desire to confess or if it is cause and effect. I feel so ashamed of my actions and the pain that I have caused to my family, OMs family. I am terrified to tell DH the truth but I dont feel as though I can go on if I dont. I dont think that he would forgive me. Why would he and Im so frightened of the impact on my 2 DDs but we are living a half life unless he knows the truth and he doesnt even know it. I would do anything to make this right again but I dont think that it can be fixed.
I lie awake thinking of all the hurt and pain Ive caused to everyone the ripples of it just keep going and going. Is it selfish to confess so that I can breathe again. What about DDs?
Has anybody been through this? What did they do?
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Relationships
cannot live with the shame any longer
ayudamedios · 25/03/2014 13:33
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