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Found DP on two dating sites

(89 Posts)
bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 14:04:23

Well last weekend we were looking at new beds and discussing moving in together and this weekend I found him on both Speed Dater and Zoosk!

We had a few ups and downs last year, but thought we had resolved things and that we were moving forward, holidays booked etc. I feel shocked and let down. He is 44 and has never settled, so perhaps commitment issues.

That is it really, just wanted to share. I know there are a lot worse stories on here.

qazxc Sun 23-Mar-14 16:26:07

He's a twat. Dump him and thank your lucky stars that you found out before you moved in with him. although I appreciate it might not feel like it now.

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 16:31:56

You are such lovely ladies on here - I did not expect so much understanding, it has been great for me today. Am here on my own and have been feeling that my judgement is very poor. Need to work on my self esteem before starting again!

AnyFucker Sun 23-Mar-14 16:32:11

It hurts because I really loved him and was the best girlfriend I could possibly be for him.

eh, you might want to rethink that sentiment in future, love. It smacks of trying to be something you are not, and makes not one jot of difference to how someone treats you. In fact, I would go so far as to say "trying to be the best girlfriend" is an invitation to those who would treat you like shit

next time, be who you want to be

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 16:38:41

Yep, I have always tried to keep those around me happy and perhaps it attracts the wrong partners? I have really good relationships with my family and friends.

AnyFucker Sun 23-Mar-14 16:40:29

Keep yourself happy first and foremost.

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 16:47:09

I will try smile

Only1scoop Sun 23-Mar-14 16:54:53

You sound so lovely. He wasn't worthy of your care.

Good luck thanks

AnyFucker Sun 23-Mar-14 16:57:22

Aww, yeah, here are some thanks from me too smile

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 17:01:10

Thank you both!! smile smile I have always admired you AF and now you have sent me flowers, thats made my day!

AnyFucker Sun 23-Mar-14 17:04:00


have you thought about what you will do if when he comes crawling back and < sarcasm alert > offers you another chance to be with the wonderful person that is Him ? If he apologises and < ahem > forgives you for your rudeness and asks to start again ?

bouncyagain Sun 23-Mar-14 17:04:26

Dump. I don't normally go for some of the more brutal advice on here, but this time I would say dump by text.

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 17:14:29

If forgiven (!) I am hoping to be strong enough to say that this is a deal breaker and I cannot be with someone I cannot trust. Don't want to waste years as with previous partner. And really, he should be with someone he really loves .....

AnyFucker Sun 23-Mar-14 17:15:09


LavenderGreen14 Sun 23-Mar-14 17:17:46

He already is with someone he loves - himself.

I agree, don't waste another moment on him.

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 17:20:03

I guess the week break is partly due to my ahem "rudeness" and also gives him the opportunity to see whoever he is talking to on line. grrrrr

LavenderGreen14 Sun 23-Mar-14 17:22:59

I bet it is - pity his next victim and thank your lucky stars it is no longer you.

Only1scoop Sun 23-Mar-14 17:25:47

Op you certainly sound on the ball....your 'rudeness' and all

I guarantee he will be pursuing you....and your rudenessgrin

Personally.... I'd get on with life and line up a few more candidates in the wingswink

BuzzardBird Sun 23-Mar-14 17:29:11

No, no, no! Don't dump by text! Prove your terrible 'rudeness' by arranging to meet him somewhere and forgetting to turn up. Please do this, he has treated you appallingly and you need to have something to giggle at!

BitOutOfPractice Sun 23-Mar-14 17:33:40

I would just never contact him or communicate with him again. Imagine his frustration when not only are you not sorry for your terrible behaviour wink but that you have the cheek never to speak to him again. Total silence. It will drive him INSANE!!

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 17:33:58

Thanks Ladies, I am giggling already! Yes I have been treated appallingly and will let him know it even more rudely!! Will keep you updated ;)

Only1scoop Sun 23-Mar-14 17:34:17

Or better still set up a 'bogus' date as another woman through the site....

Laugh in his face and walk away

Sorry I'm just getting silly now

Sunday Sauvignon syndrome wine

bouquetdiva Sun 23-Mar-14 17:45:27

I would love to do that .... would need a bogus photo

BuzzardBird Sun 23-Mar-14 17:45:51

Think of something that will really inconvience him. Tell him you have booked a hotel room with another woman who wants a threesome somewhere miles away booked in his name. Order champs to the room and leave him to pick up the bill. <disclaimer, I think I could be evil>

mammadiggingdeep Sun 23-Mar-14 17:48:24're evil...but I love it grin sound great and faaarrrr too good for him.

beckslovestimmy Sun 23-Mar-14 17:54:32

What a shit! Please get some revenge! smile

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