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Zero sex drive. Gave birth 7.5 week a go.

(13 Posts)
littleraysofsunshine Sat 22-Mar-14 22:35:31

Even in pregnancy it was a no go. I just really feel like Ive "lost it" I don't feel sexually confident, I always feel too tired and just not up for intimacy even though I'm in love and find my boyfriend of 8 years ever so attractive. hmm

Is there something wrong with me? Ds (3rd dc) was born 7.5 weeks ago so I know it's early days but I just don't ever feel like it?

cowbiscuits Sat 22-Mar-14 22:41:37

Completely normal...

KathrynJaneway Sat 22-Mar-14 22:44:05

Congratulations on your new little baby.

Just want to say go easy on yourself, you just had your baby, your body will take a little while to get back to normal. Do you mind if I ask are you breast feeding? This did have an impact on sex drive for me.

AnythingNotEverything Sat 22-Mar-14 22:46:09

You could feel like this for months. Possibly longer. Especially if breastfeeding. Completely normal.

There's something about being at a helpless human's beck and call that doesn't help you feel at all sexy. Plus your hormones are still all over the place.

Is anyone putting pressure on you or sulking about this?

FWIW, we had a good start, DTD approx fortnightly from DD being 8 weeks until about 16weeks and nothing since - DD is now 22 weeks. I think we wanted to check we still could, decided we could, then realised we'd rather sleep!

Totally normal smile
It's very early days yet anyway (I think we 'tested' it out about 2 months after each child was born but I wasn't excited at the idea!) and your hormones may well be saying that the only physical contact you really want is with your gorgeous baby.. for me DH was just a person in the house while the only bare skin I wanted near me was my beautiful baby!

However.. eventually if you kind of make the effort, the desire does come back (tho I have to say, after kids most people are too knackered to be at it like rabbits)

Just beware when you do.. you can be very fertile early on! I got pregnant again when DD1 was 4 months old... and then a year later when DS1 was 3 months old ! shock After that we were too knackered for sex for, oh about 10 years.... :D

mymiraclebubba Sat 22-Mar-14 22:47:26

Totally normal!! My dd is 7 months and I still rarely feel like it! Too bloody tired!

littleraysofsunshine Sat 22-Mar-14 23:04:03

Breastfeeding and also I have either been pregnant for breastfeeding since jan 2010 (3dcs.) so I think that may be why lol

Blondlittlelady Sat 22-Mar-14 23:09:47

My dd is nearly 7 weeks old & i feel exactly the same.
Bf is definitely a factor as after my older dc were born we would be back to normal with 2 or 3 weeks.

Personally, I know this sounds horrible but I don't fancy dh anymore. I love him but don't feel attracted to him.

I hope time improves how you feel op but I do think it's totally normal!

Blondlittlelady Sat 22-Mar-14 23:10:49

I ff or expressed with other dc.

GingerMaman Sat 22-Mar-14 23:14:26

Completely normal. Go easy on yourself. I don't think most people manage it until 3 months.

7Days Sat 22-Mar-14 23:16:06

Hopefully the not fancying your DH thing is only a temporary thing BlondLittleLady. It may be that you have no sexy feelings at all at the moment so they can't attache themselves to anyone.

I found with mine I was so touched out with pg and bf and clingy older children demanding their share of cuddles I just couldn't bear anyone else pawing at me. Pawing is what it felt like. Luckily DH wouldn't put on any pressure, if he had I'm sure I would have been on lockdown for even longer than I was.

eightandthreequarters Sat 22-Mar-14 23:19:38

Totally normal. Give yourself some time, and make sure he knows that's what you need. It won't be that long in the grand scheme of things.

If he has enough energy for sex, then he's not doing enough of the childcare. smile

evelynj Sat 22-Mar-14 23:44:22

Please. Start worrying when it's 8 months & don't even worry to much then. Take your time. At that stage if you can get a night away with a couple of hours to nap early evening' then have a meal in leave with a couple of glasses of wine, you may feel different. This is not the time to worry about such things. Take care x

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