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I don't think I love DP anymore.

(4 Posts)
NinjaBunny Tue 18-Mar-14 17:28:07

I walk on eggshells around him.

He wants me to take charge of everything. If the toilet needs cleaning he'll say 'Can we keep this clean?' but really he wants me to do it. And I feel guilted into doing it.

I'm skint at the moment. Properly skint. (Working hours are doubling as of next week though so it'll get better.) He won't help me. There's a place in town where I can take my large collection of DVDs and get £1 each for them but you need photo ID which I don't have. Asked him if he'd do it with his and he just mumbled at me.

Had a huge inheritance which paid for a chunk of our house with a bit left over as savings. They seem to have become his savings. I get whinged at frequently because I spent some of it, all on stuff we needed for the house.

He told me to work more hours. Now I've got more hours he's moaning.

I can never do anything right. Everything I do is wrong. Everything.

I'm so depressed.

We've just had a row on the phone. He didn't want what I've made for dinner. Okay, it's not been in long, I can take it out. But, no. That's not an option either and I'm not being logical.

sad

Don't know what to do. Badly want to throw up now I've admitted all of this.

RRRJ83 Tue 18-Mar-14 18:17:26

Are you able to talk to him about this in a calm way? Tell him how you feel and that you need space to figure out what you want. Sounds to me like he needs to leave.

Nomama Tue 18-Mar-14 18:49:45

You can please him very easily you know! Simply do as he has asked... take charge...

... does he have access to the savings? If so move them, they are yours, aren't they? Take control of them...

... the house, yours, both of yours? Paperwork, whose names, any dispersal agreement? Get that sorted.

When you feel more in charge have a think. Does he support you in any way? You say he demands things, but won't help you when you need some partnership. What is his part in your life?

What does he do for you? REALLY think about that one. What does he do that makes your heart flip and your toes smile?

Take charge and make your own decisions.

Good luck xx

magoria Tue 18-Mar-14 18:52:36

What Nomama says.

'Can we keep the tiolet clean?' 'Sure here are the cleaning materials', gloves on top. 'Go for it'

I think you will be much less depressed and no walking on egg shells without this guy. I bet your toilet would be cleaner too...

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