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Ok online dating, advice to start, filtering oddballs.

(6 Posts)
Gretagumbo Sun 16-Mar-14 08:37:18

Any advice gratefully received! Am 36, single mum

What sites to use?

Profile. How much to give away, what to put.

How do you filter people?

What's the etiquette if any?

Am thinking about it as it seems to be done this way but it seems a bit two dimensional but successful at times? just want to learn from others ta x

oldfashionedgirl Sun 16-Mar-14 08:46:30

I used Plenty of Fish. Lots of people on there!

My profile was just a couple of paragraphs about me. All honest stuff and said what I was looking for.

The really odd ones will prob filter themselves with their messages.

I thought I had to reply to every message to be polite but really that isn't the way to go.

akaWisey Sun 16-Mar-14 08:46:50

Depend if you want to use a paying site really. IME they tend to be slower but with fewer odd-balls (I've never had any dodgy fellows from a paying site). The free sites like POF have a huge database but obviously you need your spidey senses about you.

Feedback from chaps I've dated about profiles are they want a profile to stand out from the rest - a bit like women who want to read and see something different, something which grabs the interest. Make sure you spell check your profile, and I'd say don't ask for an 'honest, decent guy etc' since that's the most basic requirement of all and shouldn't need spelling out IYSWIM. And don't lie on yours either (not that I think you would but it's such an obvious mistake to make).

As far as etiquette goes, it's up to you and how you'd conduct yourself in RL. Decide exactly what you're looking for before you write your profile and then stick to it. That'll do your weeding for you.

scornedwoman67 Sun 16-Mar-14 10:23:13

I'd agree you're more likely to have less weirdos on paying sites...come & join us on the dating thread. ..there's loads of us discussing this sort of thing over there!

Gretagumbo Sun 16-Mar-14 11:17:06

Great thanks, I'll hop over to the dating thread and check it out x

spindlyspindler Sun 16-Mar-14 15:49:32

I used Match.com, although that was about 6 years ago now. I definitely recommend paying, not only because there are fewer people who mess you about but because if you don't pay on a paying site the people who do pay will be irritated.

(This is because some sites let non-payers send a "wink" or similar ping to paying people but you can only start an email conversation if you pay. So some people put in their profile, "I'm not a subscriber so you'll have to email me!" and then send winks all over the place. All I can say is that as someone who WAS coughing up the cash every month this really got my goat.)

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