One of our closest couple friends are in trouble. She has been having an affair with a female colleague: he found out and is devastated. She was initially regretful, tearful etc; he moved out briefly to get his head together but always wanted to work it through, he still loves her. He has been home for 3 weeks now. They have 2 dc, aged 11 and nearly 10.
She seems to want to have her cake and eat it. They went fir counseling but when the counsellor told her she needs to decide what she wants re this other woman, she has since said she won't see the counsellor again as she didn't gel with this person. Her husband is terrified of losing her and the damage splitting up will do to her kids so has given her more rope than he prob should have done; latest is that she wants to be allowed to pursue the friendship with this OW in order to work out if it's just a fling or real (presumably she will then leave).
I've been mostly sympathetic but I'm really cross now. I want to sit her down and tell her some home truths that no one else seems to be telling her - mostly about the risk of emotional harm she is exposing her children to by her self-indulgence. I know that will prob end our friendship....but I can't help how I feel. I would check with her h before I did so, wouldn't interfere if he asked me not to.
WIBU?
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I really want to talk to my friend. Should I?
8 replies
sassytheFIRST · 08/03/2014 09:28
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