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Is my ex being passive aggressive or AIBU?

(7 Posts)
rapturecapture Sun 02-Mar-14 20:53:22

My ex has had our DC this weekend.

He sent me a vague text this afternoon about something our 2 yo had said. No explanation of the context of it at all. I initially thought it was quite lighthearted and sent one back asking for more information, he didn't reply.

Why send such a vague text message and then not respond back to me when I ask for a bit more clarification? I rang him up this evening to see how DD has been (she was a bit poorly yesterday), and confront him about it he says he didn't respond back to me because he was 'busy' and then 'forgot' about it (I actually sent he message straight after receiving his). Turns out he was a bit miffed at the comment DD had made, and feels that I need to be more careful about what I say in front of her. I feel, why can't he say this directly rather than in vague texts?

I'm not sure how much sense this makes.

K999 Sun 02-Mar-14 20:56:16

Tbh your post is a bit vague confused. I'm not sure what the issue is???

Cabrinha Sun 02-Mar-14 21:04:03

Without knowing what the text said, it's impossible to know. And even then - you know him, we don't. Just don't see how we can judge that?

I think the not replying immediately and then forgetting us totally understandable - depending on what he's normally like.

Presumably you get on OK if you call on his time. Tbh, I'd expect my ex to let me know if anything important happened re ill child, but otherwise assume all OK.

Just impossible to say how vague this all was, really!

rapturecapture Sun 02-Mar-14 21:04:53

My post is a bit vague because I don't want him to find me or be outed. But basically the issue is him not responding back to messages that I have sent in response to his messages and also about not being direct with what he is thinking. He sent me a message this afternoon, very vague just saying "DD said...." . I didn't know if it was supposed to be humorous or what. Turns out ex was a bit shock about it (he needn't of been, it was just something she had clearly picked up after a conversation with one of my friends the other day). I feel that it would have been better if (a) he told me outright what she had said including the context (b) replied to my message after he sent the first one to me (c) been more honest and open about what he was thinking.

pictish Sun 02-Mar-14 21:08:01

He's your ex, so who gives a toss?

pictish Sun 02-Mar-14 21:09:44

I didn't mean that to look as rude as it did there!
I meant that you are overthinking an exchange with someone you are no longer with, and are not answerable to. And vice versa.
Don't worry about it.

tallwivglasses Mon 03-Mar-14 00:32:46

If it's vague, don't bother replying?

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