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Sad dog and breakup

(4 Posts)
babycow38 Sat 01-Mar-14 22:58:05

I know this is very unusual but it is really upsetting me tonight. I left my Exh in November after finding out he had been with OW. He blames me and continues to blame me. i let myself go, i spent too much time in the kids etc. The DD are okay,i have made sure they are, got us a lovely rented house,have kept them up to speed with college and school, they see their D when he wants to see them, the trouble is my eldest insists on taking our family dog when she goes to her Dads sometimes all weekend. We have had Meg for 8 years from apuppy, right from the start she was loved by all of us, since break up she has been clingy, off her food,worrying, never leaving my side, she has gone from his house to mine as the DD have done but i am thinking this is not good for her, Ex has said he misses her and it is no different from seeing his kids, but whilst the kids understandi dont think my dog does.

livingzuid Sat 01-Mar-14 23:03:36

Moves can be traumatic for dogs as they adapt to a new environment. They are also so intuitive and can pick up on tension and distress in the home. She needs a routine that doesn't involve a lot of upheaval and I think you are right in ensuring she stays only in one house. She has to grieve too at the loss of your ex sad

It's not easy is it. The hardest bit by a long shot was leaving my dog with my X. She still misses me apparently and looks round the house for me even 3 years on. Breaks my heart.

Dirtybadger Sat 01-Mar-14 23:05:44

You'd be better off posting this in the doghouse. Some dogs are fine in new environment. Some find it unsettling. Sounds like Meg finds it unsettling. I wouldn't want my dog regularly doing overnight somewhere she was stressed. You could do a few things to help her (eg crate training, then take the crate, so she always has the same familiar bed smells, etc) but the easiest thing would be for her to stay home. Couldn't your exh take her out for a walk with dd before popping her home and taking dd back to his, if he is so set on seeing the dog?

babycow38 Sat 01-Mar-14 23:15:17

Thank you both for replying x Meg looks round the house for me when she is with Ex and comes back to me doing the same. I now know what i have felt all along,she needs to stay with me and the girls and have that as her base,no more going back to the family home for the weekend. I will tell him and keep Meg here, i think your advice Dirtybadger was brill,why have i not thought of that? this is the way we will go, he has the girls and meg but drops Meg off before he has then overnight, Thanks for replying ,just needed a hand in deciding what to do xx

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