My DH has been depressed for a year but he’s only recently come to terms with it and started getting help. We have been married for 6 years and it was a happy marriage before this. It was all triggered by the death of a sibling.
I have tried everything I could think of to help him. I read books on depression and joined some mental health forums and I have encouraged him to stop drinking, to take exercise ad to get lots of rest. I drive him to all the appointments and try and be / say / do whatever I can to make it better but I do often feel completely defeated and like a failure.
He does seem to be grateful that I am there and he thanks me for my support but at the same time he pushes me away constantly. He’s withdrawn from me emotionally for months now and sometimes I get a feeling that he wants me to go away or like I irritate him. I went away for a week to take our daughter to see my family and he described us being gone as a relief.
At times he’s said things which have made me lose all my confidence in myself and our marriage. He has said he’s not sure how he feels about me anymore and that he doesn't feel the way he used to. He doesn't have any emotional intimacy with me at all anymore and I can't really share with him my feelings or thoughts the way I used to do.
We have a beautiful 5yo daughter and she thankfully keeps me going and I have been going for long walks every day, trying to see friends and getting counselling for myself too. Without our daughter I think I would have become depressed myself.
I am very lonely and missing my connection with my husband. I want to support my him because I love him so much but I feel like he hates me sometimes. He's very cold and I feel no emotion at all from him towards me our our daughter. He hugs me, kisses me and plays with her but it feels like he is going through the motions and his smile is false or weary.
Has anyone here had experience with this that they could share? Tips for getting through it or something to give me a sense of there being light at the end of the tunnel?
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Help with coping with depression in a marriage
9 replies
SoHeartless · 24/02/2014 13:55
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