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Please help me work out why I feel like this?

(5 Posts)
Contemplates Sun 23-Feb-14 19:03:24

My husband had put loads of photos of his ex's on my computer.

We've been together 5 years, got 2 children, and he's recently been upgrading his technology so had taken 10 or so of his best memory photos from before he met me.

But there are so many of his ex! I am a bit taken aback as he doesn't take photos of us of ether, so today, when he was doing a slide show for family and one of the teenagers began opening his 'memory' files revealing loads of another woman, there was an awkward tumble weed moment.

I'm honestly not the jealous type, but I feel uneasy. Maybe because our relationship hasn't been too great of late, and it seems almost indicative of how we feels about me.

But I feel a bit sad and as though I am biding my time before we go our separate ways, which might be overreacting but the photo thing is just the final straw.

He said to me on our way home, that he thought I probably wasn't happy about the photos. He at first lied saying that he hadn't picked them (but then agreed he had as there were only 10 photos out of each file of around 90).

So his lies about it also bothered me.

But I can't really put into words why the photos bother me. His exes don't even live nearby! Help me understand myself!

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 23-Feb-14 19:50:27

It bothers you because it was horribly insensitive and he doesn't seem to have even twigged that it might bother you until relatively late in the day. Then, rather than own up to being an idiot, he tried some feeble cover-up. Maybe 'careless and insensitive' sums up how things have been going? It's often the small thoughtless acts that hurt most.

humptydidit Sun 23-Feb-14 19:50:33

don't know if it helps but my xp had pictures on his wall of his exw.
there was even a collage thing with a pic from their wedding day and pics of just the 2 of them... you know couply ones.

like you we had hardly any pics of us together.

i called him on it and he took them down in the end but had little appreciation of why I wouldn't like them.

he also had a few intimate pics of his ex naked. god only knows why he kept them.

guess it's a good thing he is an xp as he clearly had little idea about wtf he was doing keeping them.

sorry to be blunt but it took me saying "I really enjoy giving yiu a blow job with exw watching" for the idiot to remove them

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 23-Feb-14 19:51:44

BTW... he probably did pick those 10 photos because he thought they were great photos.

Contemplates Sun 23-Feb-14 20:05:56

Thanks for your responses. I feel like I should be telling myself I am being hormonal and jealous, but I honestly know I'm not.

Rationally I can see I am more attractive than pics of the exes, but he is smiling and they are draped all over him, and I suppose I am tired and haggard from too many sleepless nights with the babies and am feeling like I'm not much value hmm

This isn't helping!

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