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Should I? Or listen to my gut instinct....

(43 Posts)
SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:25:28

Ok I meet an attractive guy at work I'm encouraging about training and promotion he mentions that he's single et I think ooooo

Te next day he turns up at my lunch period to 'chat' but I'm with a friend for a meeting about a project we are doing together he says he'll come back

Turns up next day and he says he's doing a photography course and wants to use me as a model I say yes facepalm but he starts using words I reckon are a bit odd like seductive and tempting esp as I have a student working with me in the room but then

I get a text saying he is thinking risqué photos and hopes I'm ok with that - I say er no I'm not as it's inappropriate to do with work - he asks me out for a drink I say yes.... Then omfg I'm bombarded with texts - can I FaceTime him can I install whatsapp he must chat to me asap etc when can we meet up I back off and ignore him but then

I think he is attractive looking and this could just be keen I might be missing out...... So yesterday I text an apology but then

Back to being bombarded with texts I arrange a drink on Saturday but say I need to be up early so will be early night - I suggest somewhere near him and as I go to bed see he's suggested somewhere near me - I leave it as if he sees I've read his text he texts again asking what I think but then

I find he's asked himself over to sleep on my sofa.... seriously I've talked to this guy for ten minutes and he's already asked to use me as a glamour model n to kip over

I can't figure out if he is a wonderful free spirit with no boundary issues or need of personal space who it would be worth pursuing a friendship with or a total nut job doing the dance of the seven red flags

Please MN experts help me!

SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:27:29

Oops sorry for spelling it's all the phone blush

Plus with everyone's serious problems on this board I know it's a bit light hearted but I'd so appreciate advice and was going to post on dating thread but it's v nearly full so didn't want to barge in

extracrunchy Thu 20-Feb-14 10:28:07


SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:28:56


PoorOldCat Thu 20-Feb-14 10:29:08

Seriously? Tell him to fuck off to the far side of fuck, and when he gets there, fuck off some more.

Sorry - straight answer, he's a complete weirdo. Avoid completely if possible.

SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:29:18


PoorOldCat Thu 20-Feb-14 10:29:42

Total nut job doing the dance of the seven red flags

Yes spot on!

MatryoshkaDoll Thu 20-Feb-14 10:29:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

InPursuitOfOblivion Thu 20-Feb-14 10:30:46

My DH was a bit 'full on' when we first met and it freaked me out. He's calmed down now though. Trained him like an unruly puppy! grin
Would tell him to shove his risqué pics up his bum though!

MrsWolowitz Thu 20-Feb-14 10:31:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MichonnesSamuraiSword Thu 20-Feb-14 10:31:33

or a total nut job doing the dance of the seven red flags Yep, you were right with option 3.

This man's behaviour is not normal and disrespectful of your boundaries both personal and professional.

It has red flags ALL over it. Step away for your own sake.

Onesleeptillwembley Thu 20-Feb-14 10:31:59

He thinks you'll be an easy bonk. Not very flattering. Put a complete stop to it now.

PoorOldCat Thu 20-Feb-14 10:32:42

For a start he only sees you as a sexual object. He hasn't got a clue who you actually are. Bad place to start.

Also there is unruly puppy, and there's scooby doo with rabies.

MichonnesSamuraiSword Thu 20-Feb-14 10:33:22

And learn to trust your gut instincts better in future.

Your first big red flag was wanting to use you as a model. You should have nipped it in the bud right there.

You may find it difficult to shake this guy off...

CogitoErgoSometimes Thu 20-Feb-14 10:33:34

So to summarise his chat up strategy is Hello, how are you, can you get your kit off for some photos and I'm saying 'sofa' but you'll find me in your bed at 3am if you let me across the threshold....

And the mystery of why such a good looking man is single deepens... hmm

InPursuitOfOblivion Thu 20-Feb-14 10:33:45

doing the dance of the seven red flags

Nearly spayed a mouthful of tea over the screen!

grin grin grin

SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:34:06

Hahaha bet he takes photos in the mirror....

Yeah that's it I've dated guys full on (but not this full on) and it's made me freak out but I've dated guys v relaxed n felt they aren't that into me

I guess I thought he might be normal and this might be what guys who are into you do.......... Obv the gut is right

Shame he's nice looking - it's like opening up handmade pralines to find a curly wurly

PoorOldCat Thu 20-Feb-14 10:35:26

Nice looking is an accident of birth.

SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:36:35

Hahahahaha thank you ladies you really have reality checked me

Onesleeptillwembley Thu 20-Feb-14 10:38:22

I LIKE curly wurlys. hmm but not weirdy blokes

Marcipex Thu 20-Feb-14 10:38:59


SqueeksAway Thu 20-Feb-14 10:40:32

And yes I've never met a guy who has asked to stay over on the sofa unless a v v old friend who has expected to actually stay on sofa and years ago chucked out an old friend at 3am

NorbertDentressangle Thu 20-Feb-14 10:42:56

Don't touch him, even with someone elses bargepole.

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone Thu 20-Feb-14 12:09:16

Pushy, sleazy, no boundaries, dodgy as fuck.


OvertiredandConfused Thu 20-Feb-14 12:42:52

Run. Fast. Re-establish boundaries at work. Any worries here at all tell HR.

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