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Well I ended it, going it alone as a single mum of 4

(13 Posts)
Mintymoomoo Sat 15-Feb-14 23:53:02

So following my post the other night I have left DP, actually left him getting lashed up in a hotel bar and jumped in taxi hone!

Spent whole night listening to him call the baby I'm pregnant with "that little cunt" and him raving on about how bloody great he is for trying his hardest to stick by me, like he deserves a pat on the back, he needs to bloody grow up he is 38 years old (this is after he told me if I keep he was having nothing to do with it and pushing me for abortion)

He even had the bloody cheek to ask if I got pregnant on purpose!!!!

This all came after yet another day out ruined by him and his drinking, ended up having to drag him off to the resturant we had booked at 8pm as I was bloody starving and not eaten since breakfast!

I have had enough me, my 3 DC and this baby deserve better, my kids should not have to worry he is going to get drunk again!!!

Feeling pretty nervous, it wasn't the plan to be a single mum to four kids and after bring up my 3 DC alone I didn't think I would end up in this situation but I know I will be fine, I can do this and I know I will be happier without him

Blossomflowers Sun 16-Feb-14 00:00:57

I have not seen your other thread, just wanted to say well done on leaving this horrible specimen of a man. Big hugs.

RatherBeRiding Sun 16-Feb-14 00:01:49

Far better off without him by the sound of it.

You need to get the logistics sorted as soon as - change the locks, bag up his stuff ready to send to him when you know where he's going to be staying, see a solicitor.

Better a single mum than living with a waste of space!

Havinganose Sun 16-Feb-14 00:02:19

Well done. Best decisions for you and your precious ones.

PoppadomPreach Sun 16-Feb-14 00:11:16

Well done. Sounds like you have made a very, very good decision.

CouthyMow Sun 16-Feb-14 00:20:17

Well done. If you have dealt with 3 on your own, 4 isn't that much different. I'm on my own with 4.

scornedwoman67 Sun 16-Feb-14 00:59:13

Minty....what an evil thing to say about your unborn baby. Well done for what you have decided to do. You will be fine. He is a waste of oxygen. Sending you a big hug x

frogslegs35 Sun 16-Feb-14 01:28:54

I don't know the back story but just on this post I'd like to say -
Well done! what a despicable arsehole to say that about you and his unborn child. You're well rid.
Good luck to you and your Dc for the future, big hugs xx

MsAspreyDiamonds Sun 16-Feb-14 05:14:43

Well done! Now is the time to get some practical advice so that you can make the split permanent:

www.hmrc.gov.uk/calcs-tools/index.shtml

Complete the benefits calculator to find out what you will be entitled to now that you are a single parent

www.womensaid.org.uk/

women's Aid will be able to advise you on what you need to do to make this a permanent split.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/
Advice on solo finances

Speak to a solicitor about what your options are. The first 30 minutes are free so you could see several to get the msximum advice & to see which one will serve your needs best.

Doratheexplorersboots Sun 16-Feb-14 10:34:17

Just wanted to echo by saying well done! It's brave and you should be proud; sounds like you're doing the exactly the right thing for DC and for yourself. He does sound like a very nasty man.

Speaking from experience, prepare yourself for a possible 'slump' following the elation in the days or weeks after the split. It can be a natural part of the process and even if you feel 100% that the decision was right, you may have some low times. Plan some lovely things with family and friends to keep your spirits up and try to treat yourself if you can (not easy I'd imagine with 3 DC to look after and one on the way..!). Being super busy is a good thing (long as you can get the rest you need).
Wishing you well and good luck x

Doratheexplorersboots Sun 16-Feb-14 10:35:44

And yes - you will be happier without him, you've got a life of possibilities ahead of you

Mintymoomoo Sun 16-Feb-14 11:16:43

Thanks ladies, I know I will prob hit a few low points over next few weeks but I know I'm doing the right thing!

Lucky for me we didn't live together so have no stress about lock changes or benefits to sort!

And I have a brilliant support circle and have the best friends ever so know I'm going to be ok x

handfulofcottonbuds Sun 16-Feb-14 11:25:16

You sound incredibly strong and that strength along with your support network will carry you through any tough times ahead.

Be proud of yourself and I wish you well for the new little one arriving.

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