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Is this usual for PMT, or something more I should act on?

(2 Posts)
honeypie19 Sat 08-Feb-14 20:33:30

n/c'd for this, Been with my partner for 14 years now, we have a nearly 2 year old ds.

I realised a while ago I didnt fancy him anymore, the sex has trailed off maybe around 5-6 years ago, Little irritating things he does now get on my nerves.

Ive put it all down to us being together for so long and Im sure i do things that piss him off too, But, I'd say since ds was born, I feel I do the majority of work around the house, I work p/t 2 days a week, sahm, the rest of the time, he works full time. I pray for the weekdays when he is at work. I feel like a slave to him, I ask him for help he will do bits for a day or 2 then it goes back to normal, Hes the sweetest person but hes a child in a mans body, he will come in from work, sit down and watch cartoons, doesnt listen to me, I ask about his day, tells me the same stuff just been driving nothing exciting. Then we have tea, put ds to bed and I usually go to sleep early from getting up early with ds Im bloody shattered all the time. He stays up and watches tv. We dont really do anything together anymore.

Everytime though I have PMT and thats today, we will argue about something stupid, to the ppint were I imagine leaving him and moving out, I worry about where i would move to, but I feel relieved knowing I can get away from him and dont have to live so miserably anymore. He was asked to work today, he told me and I was so looking forward to the day on my own, I cant tell you how gutted I was when it got cancelled and he didnt have to go out.

I know in a few days time I will feel the same but not as strongly if that makes sense. I can kind of get along and put up with him and its almost nice having him around. But still in the back of my mind I like not having him around so much.

I just dont know whether its just me and my mood swings and I need to try something else, Or we've finally reached that point where I dont even want to save us. Do you get like this each month?

CogitoErgoSometimes Sat 08-Feb-14 21:16:22

From what you describe he's lazy, immature, boring, distant, ignores you, takes you for granted and shows you no affection. So you put up with it for a while until eventually some minor problem kicks off into an argument. You're calling it PMT but I think it sounds like your frustration hitting peaks and troughs. The arguments are in place of a total absence of communication.

I think you probably do need to try something else but the 'you' has to be plural i.e. both of you. I don't know if he's happy with the way your lives are but you are clearly not happy. If you'd both like the relationship to continue and are willing to put in some effort then counselling might be the way forward. But if he's quite content with the way things are, you're going to struggle.

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