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He's been a dick so why the pain?

(5 Posts)
superstarheartbreaker Fri 07-Feb-14 21:41:54

I am still in love with my ex. He was a dick though...so why do I care? I think the problem is I want to blame him but then I wonder if I was a knob end too.
It is sometimes hard to untangle who was a knob to who.
Also I felt there was so many positives for us: fancied the pants of each other, he said the best sex he'd ever had, similar interests, very passionate but emotionally charged. I think emotional abuse on both sides. We were hanging out as a family so it hurts that it's all gone. His son misses my dd etc. one silly row and poof...he's gone.
Apparently I am like his mum( who is lovely) but still. Why isn't love enough?

rabbitlady Fri 07-Feb-14 21:53:22

no answers from me, sorry. it will pass eventually. so they say.

Lozislovely Fri 07-Feb-14 21:56:07

Super - I don't have anything else to say except I'm in the same position.

Been crying literally non-stop for past 2 days (split in July) and I honestly feel as low as I'll ever be.

Was it all me? - No - did I instigate arguments and such like - yes!

Did I feel worthless? - Yes!

Do I want him back?- Tonight I do, I ache, I want, I need - I don't know why but I need him to hug me and tell me that everything will be ok. Except be hasn't said that, he's said I need to grieve.

So fuck him, fuck them all, we don't need them, we just need to be strong because we are worth so much more x

superstarheartbreaker Fri 07-Feb-14 22:03:11

It's so hard when you love them and yet they have been such knob ends. Such conflicting emotions. And then we blame ourselves. I have been a knob too. Uuuuggggrrr. Why such hard work?
Hope your ok lozislovely. We're you married? Sounds like you were with him so much longer than me. I only knew mine for five months and it was a bit messed up between us ( baggage on both sides) but gosh I love him even though so wrong.

Lozislovely Fri 07-Feb-14 22:20:34

Does your head in doesn't it!

I was in a 20 year relationship from 18, some good times, a lot bad.

Doesn't detract from the fact that when a relationship ends you think it means your life ends.

So many emotions and feelings! On the positive side, you only have to read some of the threads on the relationship thread to know that you aren't alone.

The bad times will pass, not always as quickly as you'd like, but such is life!

I try to think of the times that I had to do stuff like a single person would have to, remind myself (constantly) that I'm not a piece of shit and that I will come out of this bigger and stronger than I thought I would ever be!

Gotta hope wink

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