Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

How do you practice safe sex with oral?

(65 Posts)
mmonroe Fri 31-Jan-14 22:47:42

Genuine question.

My very long term relationship ended a little while ago. I am just thinking of the future and potentially meeting someone else.

Of course I want to practice safe sex and use condoms but I have no idea how oral sex is performed safely. Is it done over the condom?

Can anyone advise as apart from asking a new partner to produce a doctor's note of his sexual health, I don't know what else to do.

Samwidge Fri 31-Jan-14 22:54:05

Use a condom or an oral dam/barrier. Otherwise, STD checks as soon as possible ie before things become too physical.

EBearhug Fri 31-Jan-14 22:55:36

It's why you can get flavoured condoms.

mmonroe Fri 31-Jan-14 23:06:12

I'd never heard of oral dams, thanks for the link.

So it would either be dams or flavoured condoms?

Do clinics offer sexual health screening if it's just because you're starting out with a new partner or do you need a more valid reason?

EBearhug Fri 31-Jan-14 23:07:43

Starting out with a new partner is a very valid reason - I think they'd rather see you then than later when you're showing symptoms because you weren't so careful about your sexual health.

mmonroe Fri 31-Jan-14 23:16:21

I'm not seeing anyone at the moment but I'm just getting it all straight in my head as I don't want to be caught out and not know what the 'done thing' is.

Checking it out medically might sound a bit clinical but this would be my preferred thing.

EirikurNoromaour Sat 01-Feb-14 06:59:15

You can get a full screen whenever you like, you don't need a reason.

ImperialBlether Sat 01-Feb-14 13:41:13

I could not be bothered with all that. Who the hell would get pleasure from giving oral sex using a condom or an oral dam? I can understand prostitutes using them and I know a lot of gay men who are having very casual sex will do it, but why would you, OP?

tracypenisbeaker Sat 01-Feb-14 13:50:08

Imperial, i for one prefer using protection because i would be worried about the herpes virus being transmitted, like before a cold sore shows up. Dont know why gay men would be more justified in needing a condom for oral as opposed to hetero males, casual sex is casual sex after all, i would hope condoms would be used at all times regardless regardless of sexuality.

mmonroe Sat 01-Feb-14 13:50:08

I agree imperial, it does seem it would take the edge off the moment and be quite clinical.

So is the only answer to ask for a sexual health screening? Surely if the man is worth it then he will understand and respect that?

I just want to be safe.

ImperialBlether Sat 01-Feb-14 14:19:37

The gay men I am specifically talking about, tracy, are extremely promiscuous and this does make the chance of an infection much more likely.

MadeMan Sat 01-Feb-14 16:08:38

"It's why you can get flavoured condoms."

Yep, that's right. They do curry flavour ones in my local gents.

str8tothepoint Sat 01-Feb-14 16:10:11

Safe oral sex is pointless sorry, you may aswell go buy a cucumber and suck that

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Sat 01-Feb-14 16:11:53

I could not be bothered with all that. Who the hell would get pleasure from giving oral sex using a condom or an oral dam? I can understand prostitutes using them and I know a lot of gay men who are having very casual sex will do it, but why would you, OP


STIs that are commonly caught through oral sex are:

genital herpes

Infections that are less frequently passed on through oral sex include:

hepatitis A, hepatitis B and hepatitis C
genital warts
pubic lice

MadeMan Sat 01-Feb-14 16:17:31

" may aswell go buy a cucumber and suck that"

Make sure you get that cucumber checked out though, or you may end up with Gardener's Mouth and you won't like that.

mmonroe Sat 01-Feb-14 16:42:28

Thanks for your input str8tothepoint hmm I am actually asking a genuine question.

I'm thinking more strawberry than curry mademan.

ImperialBlether Sat 01-Feb-14 17:50:27

Yes, ItsAllGoingToBeFine, I know that if you are with a stranger who you think might have pubic lice or syphilis then you should use a condom if you are going down on him.

However, having oral sex with a condom on wouldn't give the woman any pleasure (surely?) and knowing you're doing it like that because of the syphilis would surely take any enjoyment out of it, so why would a woman want to do this? What is in it for her?

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Sat 01-Feb-14 17:58:32

It all depends where you are in the relationship I suppose. If you are using some sort of barrier for penetrative sex to guard against STIs (as opposed to pregnancy) surely you should do the same for oral sex?

thedogwakesuptoodamnearly Sat 01-Feb-14 18:19:42

The oral dam isn't just for covering's for cunts too, so you don't get herpes.

thedogwakesuptoodamnearly Sat 01-Feb-14 18:21:22

PS sorry if that's widely known, it's quite a new fact to me...

mmonroe Sat 01-Feb-14 18:21:40

Eloquently put shock

ImperialBlether Sat 01-Feb-14 18:23:31

Bet you're feeling like staying in in front of the telly for the rest of your life now, mmonroe!!

mmonroe Sat 01-Feb-14 18:24:45

That would be the safest option imperial!

Good grief!

gamerchick Sat 01-Feb-14 18:33:41

its easier to get a full screen when you want to ditch the condoms. If one party refuses then you know the score and act accordingly.

thedogwakesuptoodamnearly Sat 01-Feb-14 20:47:56

I think everyone should get screened regularly. You could keep your results in a shagging passport smile

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: