How much did your divorce cost and how did you finance it?

[PPaka]

And was it straightforward or contested?
I have no idea how people do it

[TheScreamingfrog]

I shall be watching with interest as this is where I am at too

[MirandaWest]

XH and I are getting divorced. As it's straight forward and we're amicable with each other we're doing it without solicitors, so the total cost is £410 which we've split 50:50. Came out of my savings.

[handfulofcottonbuds]

It depends on whether it is straightforward and amicable.

I will be divorcing under adultery and my solicitor says she will apply for my H to pay my legal fees as a result, he could contest paying of course.

Also depends on whether you think H is not being truthful about their savings etc and then you go for full disclosure which can be costly but does mean that you know down to the penny if there is any hidden money. Also, there may be mediation to pay for if you need that to sort out the money. My mediation is £300 for 3 hours to be split equally, I hope we only need one appointment!

[TurnOffTheTv]

Ours was straightforward and amicable, £350 online, he paid as he was getting married again.

[Phaush]

Straight forward and amincable - cost me nothing. Took legal advice from my union and discovered that chances are we'd have got 50:50 on the house (only asset, no kids) even though I'd only lived in it and paid toward it for 1 year of the 5 we'd owned it (both on mortgage the whole time)

Legal advice was good - OH had previously offered me a tiny percentage of the equity. I was happy to have less as I'd not paid toward the mortgage for so long, or, indeed, the repairs that had been done. I offered a 3/8 5/8 split in the equity if OH paid for the paperwork, which is what we did.

[akawisey]

Not straight forward - £10,000.

[KouignAmann]

£6000 (from my savings) but XH is a bully and I needed a good solicitor to fight my corner. Worth it as I got half the house and half the pension but he went back on the (expensively) mediated agreement over supporting the DC at Uni which I could do bugger all about.

[elastamum]

About £5K. Worth every penny, as the solicitor negotiated my keeping our home and we now have a court order in place which means ex has had to keep paying his half of the DC school fees.

I paid, then without asking the judge awarded costs against him

[Sorcha1966]

pretty straightforward but kids and a house and pension pot (mine) .. Cost me about £9000 and him ?

worth it though. The assets were mine - and he didnt deserve anything. Still got £100,000 + though

[FluffyJumper]

5k but worth it as my ex is a bully and good with money.

[heliumheart]

Mine has cost me about £12k so far (also divorcing a nightmare ex) and I've had to finance it by getting a divorce loan against an investment flat I've got. We've got a way to go yet, it's grim! So hoping we can reach a settlement...

handfulofcottonbuds - be aware re. costs that the adultery might mean you have a very slight sway in terms of getting costs awarded by a Judge, but since costs often run into the thousands it is rare to be awarded costs in family matters. The other party needs to demonstrate that they have behaved badly in litigation terms, thereby running up your own costs unnecessarily - eg. by not disclosing properly, by not engaging with the process, etc. It's a bit confusing because on the petition there is a section which asks whether you will be applying for the other person to pay costs and this (I think) refers to the cost of lodging the application. In most cases the other party's solicitor will advise them to say that they accept the petition but do not accept costs - knowing it will be fought over at a later point. As an example, I have just run up in excess of £1000 costs because my ex refuses to do his full financial disclosure. It is now so serious that he has received a penal notice and will possibly go to prison if he does not complete it by a set date. In this instance I have been told it is highly likely we will be awarded costs because his behaviour is so clearly costing me money unnecessarily.

Oh to divorce a normal man!!! We tried mediation, but it was a joke. You HAVE to have two reasonable people sat at the table.

[handfulofcottonbuds]

helium - thanks for the advice. Everyone thinks I'll come out of this much better financially as my H earns substantially more than me (we have no DCs together). I am not so sure though, I don't even think I'll get enough to buy another property.

I too am not sure mediation will work as he is a liar and just wants a quick end so he can get a place with OW.

I hope you get yours sorted soon, horrible situation.

[lookingfoxy]

My exs was 500, straightforward though.

[glamourousgranny42]

Not contested. Straight split. Online £65. But it costs £350 to file papers with court on top of that.

[SlightlyDampWellies]

Lord at some of these responses. Dh's divorce from his ex was £100 k in legal fees alone, plus the settlement.

It was very very acrimonious, took 5 years when they had been married a mere 21 months and considering she was the one who cheated, I am at a loss as to know why he came off worse.

NB- he was in the middle of it when we met.

Dh always says if he gets divorced again (one hopes not!) he would have his ex's law firm. They were arseholes.

[EveryGoodBoyDeservesFun]

Approx £10k 10 years ago, but included the conveyancing fees for the new house I had to buy. Wasn't straightforward (though it should have been but he and his solicitor made it very acrimonious).

Financed from the final divorce settlement but I had to pay an interim payment of £1500 which I had to sell my car to fund.

[SlightlyDampWellies]

Oh, and how did he finance it? He sold the family farm. And had to start again from scratch.

[handfulofcottonbuds]

wellies - that is unbelievable. Did they have DCs or was it all down the ExW's legal firm?

[jayho]

Mine cost me about £50k and him about £120k. He took barristers to every hearing insisted on everything going to final hearing, lost every time. I offered to do it low cost through mediation, would have been about £1800 each. Tosser. Oh and he had to pay it all, the judge described him as malicious and bunged my fees on top of my settlement, so not an award for fees, Helium's right, they don't like doing that, buy he made sure I didn't lose out because of ex's actions.

[SlightlyDampWellies]

No DCs together.

I think it was and is unbelievable. It has now been more than a decade since the settlement, and he/we are still counting every penny and remortgaging. There is alot of background to this but Dh actually sued his own lawyers for bad advice and won, but that meant very little in the end.

[angel1976]

About £5K for mediation so far. STBXH chose an expensive legal firm located behind Selfridges in London. And in fact, I ended up coming off better as she got me some stuff I did not expect from STBXH and he wanted the mediation... TWAT. He paid for this as he wanted it and I wanted no part of it, we had already agreed mostly how we would split our assets.

I chose my own lawyer to file the initial paperwork for the decree nisi. Estimated costs are about £1000 (included fixed court cost of £410). We will split this as he was whinging about paying for mediation. My parents have given me some money so I will pay my half out of that.

STBXH will then pay for his legal team to draft up the consent order and to file for the decree absolute. Again, this shouldn't cost much as we have done the basics in the mediation sessions we did.

Can't f**king wait for that to happen so I can move on. P.S. Not that it matters but STBXH left me for OW, though he insisted there was no affair when he left. But less than 6 months after he left, she had moved into his place. Whatever! I am well rid.

[Minime85]

have been quoted roughly £1,200 for divorce itself £420 then the rest is my solicitor fees. not sure how I will pay for it yet, that assuming it stays amicable and ex doesn't contest anything.

[wiseoldowl]

Approx £11k.
XH hid money when completing legal form (as well as splitting up friends marriage for OW) so very acrimonious but went NC (still am 3 years later).
Divorce can be cheaper if sols not involved but once that happens IMO they know how to milk the situation & don't actually help.
I paid for mine with some savings,by paying monthly dd & rest on interest free credit card balance transfer. 6 months to go.
If XH died tomorrow it couldn't be soon enough.

[handfulofcottonbuds]

angel1976 - my solicitor has asked whether my H intends to move in with OW within 6 months as this may affect a settlement, he refuses to answer it although has told me he will move in with her in the Spring.

Does anyone know if it works in my favour if he does move in with OW?

[wiseoldowl]

Oh,also looking at cotton buds post re mediation...which we did,& apparently court requires now.
Had 2 sessions (hardest thing I've ever had to do,control my emotions in a room with a philanderer.
We reached agreement, he was going to get sol to write it up. Then 2 days later changed his mind (equivalent of a months wages down the drain,not to mention emotional distress..went on ADs at this point).