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thank you Anyfucker - spot on

(95 Posts)
holstenlips Sun 20-Oct-13 19:01:22

Following my thread re my fiance sexting another woman. I told his mum who was very supportive of me.
Yesterday I found out shes said that because of my recent depression ive either made it all up or have totally overreacted.
Anyfucker warned me at that time to remember that blood is thicker than water. Well that is spot on. My x has also gone with her version of events. I felt so down about it yday. But then I remembered AF and her comment. Thank you.

ZingMayor Thu 24-Oct-13 19:33:10

diddl why? because she is human.

I'd dare you to keep your cool when someone is wounding you up deliberately while you are trying to help someone else.

diddl Thu 24-Oct-13 19:53:59

I suppose I'm lucky that I've never been goaded on here.

Best ignored IMO.

And to pm the person you are trying to help.

Which AF may have done, of course.

ZingMayor Thu 24-Oct-13 19:58:54

diddl but why should AF or anyone need to pm the OP on a thread that was started in relationships?

there would be no threads, but

"hi, some shit happened, here are the details - please PM me with advice. no trolls. thanks"

and yes, you are lucky if you were never goaded (unless you are being sarcastic, sorry, I can't tell)

diddl Thu 24-Oct-13 21:11:01

There shouldn't be a need to pm-was just a suggestion if a thread is being derailed such that OP might not return.

Didn't make that clear.

I wasn't being sarcastic, AF is a forthright & prolific poster & that possibly makes her a target?

But it wasn't about her being goaded on one thread, was it-it was an accumulation of posts?

I do think that some of the reactions on here have been OTT though.

Such as AF should be allowed back immediately as her advice is so invaluable that someone might come to harm for her not being available!

ZombieZing Thu 24-Oct-13 21:34:10

diddl thanks, I just wasn't sure if you were sarcastic or not.

And I do understand that you question AF's importance to the point that there is a" riot", but the fact is that there is an outrage shows to me that:

A, she is very important to a lot of people (that can not be denied) and some will be missing her advice and help even for a week

B, there's a serious issue about trolling/goading that is not dealt with to everyone's satisfaction (including me)

C, people will be banned if they break Talk Guidelines (as judged by MNHQ) no matter how well-known/important/liked they are

D, there are no absolute ways to know what posts and why might be deleted after being deemed as personal attacks, while others are left to be seen (despite some of us thinking the non-deleted ones are way worse)

(there is an E and an F as well, but I have to go)

It is sad and infuriating to realize that if you defend yourself or someone else by reacting to people who deliberately wind you up to achieve something, you risk punishment and they "win"

(and that is regardless of how many times AF was deleted or warned before, because by the look of it at least some of her previous posts were also deleted for calling a spade a spade.)

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 08:41:46

He wants me back. What do I do? Scared of this future alone going over and over things. :-( He was the love of my life.

BOOsterseatforAnyFucker Fri 25-Oct-13 08:49:39

Of course he wants you're back, you're awesome!

Do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering if hes going to start texting someone else? Do you think living with that uncertainty is going to help your depression?

To quote Albert Einstein - "Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving"

Id rather be alone than with someone who tells OW they have a hard on. Charmless Bastard.

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 08:54:46

Of course you are right Booster..I know it will forever haunt me. Especially as he wont admit that it was a come-on. I would be forever anxious that he was doing it again.
My dd is ill again so im feeling low, got noone to help.
It feels relentless.

DoctorTwo Fri 25-Oct-13 09:04:26

Morning Holsten. Another quote from Einstein: if we don't learn from our mistakes we are doomed to repeat them.

The cheat does not deserve you, and you deserve to be treated better than he's treated you.

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 09:09:00

Thank you Doctor. I suppose I will get over this bump. if I was to see him I'd feel sick anyway. We work together but I cant go in today anyway as dd is ill.

DoctorTwo Fri 25-Oct-13 09:46:30

If AF was here she'd probably tell you what he's going to come out with next, she's wise like that. Hope your daughter is better soon.

BOOsterseatforAnyFucker Fri 25-Oct-13 10:43:54

Get on the sofa and snuggle with a movie and DD.

We are always here for hand holding or venting

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 12:00:51


BOOsterseatforAnyFucker Fri 25-Oct-13 15:21:11

Is your DD feeling any better?

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 15:49:14

She's not too bad Booster thanks for asking. I was just about to come on here and say " Aaargh" you must be psychic. Think im coming down with the lergy too.
The weekend stretches ahead.

BOOsterseatforAnyFucker Fri 25-Oct-13 16:19:00

<sends good vibes via psychic powers>

All wet windy weekends are good for is pizza and MN.

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 16:31:24

Yes indeed. Good plan. And not replying to begging texts

BOOsterseatforAnyFucker Fri 25-Oct-13 16:32:36

You can practice your evil cackle for when they come through

DoctorTwo Fri 25-Oct-13 17:10:11

Definitely don't reply to the texts, just laugh at him. I honestly don't get why so many men do that. He's crossed a line, been dumped and now he wants back. Balls to him.

holstenlips Fri 25-Oct-13 19:10:21

Yes he is feeling very hard done by. Urgh. Luckily the thought of him makes me feel sick.

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