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What is the age gap between yourself and your partner?

(87 Posts)
squinney Mon 30-Sep-13 15:58:23

and what would you consider to be too old or too young?

queenbitchapparently Mon 30-Sep-13 20:56:27

My ex husband was 9 years older than me. I have had a bf that was 12 years older than me.
My current partner is a couple of years older.
I don't really have an upper age limit but would not date anyone significantly younger than me.

MrsPnut Mon 30-Sep-13 20:39:51

OH is 5 years older than me and I don't even notice apart from pulling his leg about being an old codger. We like the same type of music and have mostly the same reference points from our childhood.

WingDefence Mon 30-Sep-13 20:36:44

It's not what's on the birth certificate, it's who they are as a person.

^^ This smile

WingDefence Mon 30-Sep-13 20:35:56

I'm 36 too but my DH is 52 so 16yrs between us. We met at work when I was 24 and he was 40 and finally got together when I was 29 and he was 45.

He's wonderful and we have a very happy marriage. FWIW there was a similar age gap between his parents.

36 and 44 is not that much of a gap to me smile

thegreylady Mon 30-Sep-13 20:34:28

My dh is 8 years older than me-it works well for us.
My dd is 13 months older than her dh and that is fine too.
My dh was 12 years older than his ex and she found that a problem.She is now married to a man 10 years younger than her-they seem fine.

TaudrieTattoo Mon 30-Sep-13 20:24:54

DP is fifteen years older than me. Age gap a complete non-issue. He's great. I completely adore him.

STBXH was three years older and just about ready for his pipe and slippers.

It's not what's on the birth certificate, it's who they are as a person.

My DP is 21 years older than me. We have been together for 3 years and getting married soon. The age gap has not yet presented an issue smile

fluffyraggies Mon 30-Sep-13 19:47:45

DH is 10 years younger than me grin

XH was 2 years older.

It helps that i look younger than i am and he looks older than he is. Well it helps me, anyway, as i am shallow enough to worry about that kind of stuff smile

cupcakeicing Mon 30-Sep-13 19:44:28

DH is 8 years older, we have different memories of children's TV programmes but other than that we are soulmates.

FellatioNelson Mon 30-Sep-13 19:42:57

DH is five years older than me, and my ex-H was four years older. I've never had a younger boyfriend, and oldest fling/shag was 18 years older, when I was 23 and he was 41. He wanted to date me properly but tbh I just found him too old for me. I can't imagine being with anyone more than ten years older/younger but I wouldn't rule it out in theory.

Crownjewel Mon 30-Sep-13 19:42:26

DP is 10 years older than me, and neither of us have ever considered the 'age gap'.

That said, XP is 19 years older and it wasn't an issue either, in fact we're still very good friends - the reason it doesn't work out between us was an, 'expectation gap'.

I have never dated anybody younger than me though (I agree with previous posters about the male mind taking longer to mature grin)

Ohfuckohfuckofuck Mon 30-Sep-13 19:38:00

DH is 14 days older than me.

I've stuck within a few years either way.

I have had a major, major work crush on a man 15 years older than me and wouldn't think twice if I was single. But he is very mature, caring, thoughtful fit as a fit fittie & handsome. He also has youngish tastes. Our other desk buddy was 2 years younger than him, but always seemed like an old man.

Ledkr Mon 30-Sep-13 19:30:53

It's nice to hear of all the you her men older women combos in this thread.
It works well here too and I even managed a baby at 43 buy I often wonder if we are in a very tiny minority.

timetohaveago Mon 30-Sep-13 19:29:00

DH was 10 years older. Age was partly to blame for our split as he had very dated expectations of a woman's role and he was a dickhead

Last two long term relationships have been 6 and 7 years younger and age wasn't an issue.

But now I'm 50ish I'm wondering how feasible it is to attract a younger partner........but I'm trying. Definitely don't want someone older, except for wining and dining purposes grin

Straitjacket Mon 30-Sep-13 19:10:24

He is 8 months older than me.

No more than 10 years older for me I think, and 5 years younger (currently. Might change as I get older!)

deste Mon 30-Sep-13 19:03:44

DH is two weeks older than I am.

Calabria Mon 30-Sep-13 18:48:01

My husband is almost eleven years younger than me. It works for us.

My ex is fourteen years older than me. That worked too. It wasn't the age gap that split us up, we were together for eighteen years.

PaperPomPom Mon 30-Sep-13 18:07:53

DH is 12 years older than me. I'm an old head on younger shoulders and he's like a big kid sometimes, so it works and isn't really noticeable. Most people think we are both around the same age until we tell them otherwise.

I never thought I'd want someone older, but it's just the way it turned out. We haven't got DC together (he has 2, I have none) but it doesn't concern either of us that he will be older as he's so young behaviour wise, fit and healthy. We are just waiting for the right time impatiently.

OneLittleToddleTerror Mon 30-Sep-13 17:55:17

My uncle has just had a new baby a couple of years ago at 58. The wife is 30. So I have plenty of family example to imagine what it could be like.

OneLittleToddleTerror Mon 30-Sep-13 17:53:54

And I expect my retirement will be poor obviously. I have peanuts in my pension provisions.

OneLittleToddleTerror Mon 30-Sep-13 17:53:21

over yes in the sense that I am not ready for a pensioners lifestyle at 40. But if I am with someone who is say 30 years older than me and in retirement, the chance of him being able to afford overseas holidays are lower. And let's not talk about saving up for a university education for the children. I'm only putting the very rational hat on.

Not everyone retired can't afford done luxury in life ofc. My aunt's husband is retired and goes to plenty of expensive foreign holidays and stay in hotel suites. But with two incomes, we still have to save for our holidays, so I'm just talking at a more normal income level.

Grotbagstwin Mon 30-Sep-13 17:52:33

5 years between myself and dp, I presumed he was older as his friend who set us up knew I liked older men, a month doen the line I found out he was only 5 years older and I admit if I found. Out on first date it wouldn't have gone any further! blush
My biggest age gap was 21 year gap for a relationship in the past.

BabyBorn Mon 30-Sep-13 17:49:27

19 years between us. Have been together just over 6 years and have 2 DC, married for almost 5 years.There is a noticeable age gap when it comes to life in general as he's very calm and likes a quiet easy life and happy to be at home all time when he's not working etc, where I am different.

Never been with anyone my own age, always been 5 + years older when I was younger but now I wouldn't go under 15 years or over 25 (depending on the persons general health and fitness of course)

Wuxiapian Mon 30-Sep-13 17:48:09

DP is 10 years older - met 11 years ago, been together 5.

emmelinelucas Mon 30-Sep-13 17:45:21

My husband is almost 17 years older than me.
It doesnt really matter because we were both quite old when we married.
I dont think the age diference matters so much after a certain age.
I love him smile

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