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SIL - did you mean to be so rude?!

(78 Posts)
HappyGoLuckyGirl Sun 22-Sep-13 00:19:13

Long - but makes sense. I think grin

I started a thread not so long ago, wondering if I was being really lazy by going to sleep during the day, while my 10 week old DS slept. Mainly because my SIL kept telling me how 'she never went back to sleep when her DD napped' sick face

ANYWAY...we went to a Shake, Rattle and Roll class on Friday morning. It came up in conversation that I was feeling a little under the weather, tired, etc. I said that I was going to go to the Dr's as my Mum, my Aunt and my first cousin all have under active thyroids, so thought I should get it ruled out.

And she said something along the lines of the following: "well, no offense, but when you go to sleep during the day and don't get out and about then you're bound to feel like shit."

I was a little stunned at first but managed to say that I wasn't the same as her and regardless, I did go out most days. To which she replied "Yes, well you only walk to the village and back". (The village is about a 10 minute brisk walk away, I go to do my errands, post office, chemist, shops etc, and then come back home. I'm out for between 30-60 mins almost every day).

Our conversation was halted anyway and then the topic got changed. She then text me later in the evening saying she didn't mean to be awful, she was just trying to be helpful and give advice. I said I knew she wasn't being awful and that everyone has their own opinion and way of doing things.

To which she replied "Good, but getting out is good, especially for DS"

It quite upset me because as a new Mum to a 12 week old, I already feel like the things I do are perhaps not good enough. I should be singing to him more, talking to him more, playing with toys more, etc. For example: I was changing his bum at 5am the other morning and was half asleep distracted but the thought ran through my mind "you should be talking to him".

I don't know why it has bothered me so much. Why she bothers me so much; why I let her. I do go out almost every day with DS, not to the park or anything but bloody hell he is 3 months! hmm I guess it just reverberated my fears that I'm not doing enough with him.

Don't know why I've posted here actually, I just needed to get it out I suppose. sad

HappyGoLuckyGirl Tue 24-Sep-13 23:14:45

Thanks Happybear and everyone else for that matter.

Strawberry - no, she was nice as normal! Which has now made me feel like I blew it all out of proportion as she is a really nice person and will do anything for you. This is the first barney we've had in the 3 years I've known her. Maybe we were both having off days!

Thanks for all the reassurance, helped a lot. And for those who suggested going to the docs again, I'm going to make an appointment for next week. There's something wrong as I'm just so exhausted!

HappyGoLuckyGirl Tue 24-Sep-13 23:16:36

Hellobear not happybear! Although that would be a cool name.

MissStrawberry Wed 25-Sep-13 08:02:50

She may have had an off day but that would bring a realisation of what a prat she was and therefore an apology. I strongly suspect she has manipulated the situation to make you look unhinged and I would be wary of her in the future. If she tries this shit again I would tell her straight.

If she apologised then of course fresh start.

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