Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Normal to feel better so quickly?

(34 Posts)
RollerCola Mon 26-Aug-13 10:18:44

My husband & I decided to separate 6 weeks ago. Before that I was depressed, anxious, extremely stressed & emotional. I asked the dr before we actually split for anti-depressants but didn't take them straight away.

Once we'd made the decision to separate I felt immediate relief, but my emotions went through the roof & all of the above symptoms got even worse. I knew it was the right decision but I couldn't cope with the emotional stress of it all. I started taking the tablets to try to stabilise them so I could make all the practical decisions that needed to be addressed.

6 weeks on I feel like a new woman! Stbex is still at home but we've made all the decisions about money etc, told everyone who needs to know and I'm now thinking about & planning my new life. All the stress has lifted, I'm not anxious or depressed & my head is clear.

It just feels a bit unnatural, like the tablets are masking something. Should it all be feeling this good so quickly?! Don't get me wrong I'm very very grateful that I feel so much better - it just feels a bit weird telling people I'm getting divorced after 20 yrs with such a big smile on my face!

Helennn Mon 26-Aug-13 12:48:15

Just going out now, but will check back later. Thanks for talking, sorry for posting and running.

RollerCola Mon 26-Aug-13 12:55:34

Thanks everyone, it's a big help to read your experiences. I do feel a bit in limbo - the future is so unknown it's hard to know how I'm going to feel. But so far I've not had a single doubt, so so far so good.

RollerCola Mon 26-Aug-13 15:29:34

Helenn just wanted to add that I was also completely dreading telling my parents. The journey to their house to tell them was one of the worst things I've ever done but they were (& still are) completely wonderful. They were distraught to find out how awful things have been for me, because I'd never told them. But not once have they questioned me or judged me.

My dad said something v similar to mammas - he said he couldn't bear to see me so unhappy & that nothing was impossible to sort out. My mum's only worry when I turned up with my 'news' was that someone was seriously ill. She said that anything else was completely fixable & they are both fully supportive of everything I do.

Making the jump is hideous, the worst thing you may ever do. But by God the view is wonderful! The more I tell people irl my story the more support I'm getting. People will completely understand & just want you to be happy.

mammadiggingdeep Mon 26-Aug-13 15:52:34

Rollercola.... Have tears reading that. Exactly the same as my experience. I could have written that word for word. Big hugs to you.....wishing us every success on our new adventures xx

RollerCola Mon 26-Aug-13 16:22:19

Mamma, you know that feeling of dread you get when he comes home? And the treading on eggshells that you do when he's around so as not to upset him? That goes! It really does!

RollerCola Mon 26-Aug-13 16:25:18

Sorry mamma, I meant that for helenn. You probably know that already don't you?!

mammadiggingdeep Mon 26-Aug-13 16:58:21

Yep.....I know!!!!!! Did the washing up really badly this row or sarky comments.....bliss!!!! Welcome to the rest of my life smile)))

RollerCola Tue 27-Aug-13 18:32:56

Oh the joy to not have all the grumping & stroppiness grin. I'm behind you (he's not left yet) but I had a glimpse of my new life last week when I went away for a few days with the kids. It was complete heaven.

saggyhairyarse Tue 27-Aug-13 22:19:58

I split up from my XH 3 years ago and, apart from when I realised that I would never be completely shot of the abusive alcoholic bastard because I had kids with him where I felt 'down' about 6 months after we split, I haven't looked back.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now