My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Am I being unnessecarily suspicious?

19 replies

PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 19:48

Background. My DP is a Finance Director for a moderate sized company. They are currently expanding and restructuring and so have a lot of work on.

so hes actually away from home this week (3 hrs drive) hes been talking about what they are doing. thats remortgaging a couple of the businesses. he was supposed to be at a solicitors yesterday to do paperwork and sign but they postponed to today at 2 then pushed to 5 then 7. now he just messaged to say the solicitor said he would be lucky to be finished T midnight.

does this all sound viable? im not a business person so i dont know.

im a little suspicious. why wouldnt the solicitor put it off till tomo.

it means hes likely not going to get home tonight now.

he has form for using a dating website about 4 yrs ago when we first met and i prob have been more suspicious since i found out about that. (only found out about the deception 2 yrs ago.

What do u think am i being over suspicious????

OP posts:
Report
lemonstartree · 01/08/2013 19:54

it sounds all too viable wrt the business /signing stuff. very common - although usually would be delayed till tomorrow rather that later and later unless there was an important reason.

if you dont trust him however, you have other problems I think?

Report
worsestershiresauce · 01/08/2013 19:54

Legals can run into the night if there is a deadline. Unusual though, and it tends to be on mergers and acquisitions stuff rather than internal restructuring.

Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 20:12

Hmm. That's what I thought. He sent me a photo of one of the solicitors and his business partner in an office. That made me more suspicious than reassured me.

OP posts:
Report
welshharpy · 01/08/2013 20:34

Could ask him to skype you sometime tonight when he gets time, might be easier to see if something is amiss if you are looking at him square in the eye?
Sending a pic of him in an office just sounds odd...

Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 21:28

hmmm. i suggested a quick facetime before inhead upmtombed and he said he cant as hes in the solicitor office. hmmmm.

OP posts:
Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 21:29

i have asked why they didnt put it off till tomo. he wont give me a straight answer.

OP posts:
Report
DHtotalnob · 01/08/2013 21:29

agree with worse. All-nighters are not usual for internal stuff unless the company has some weird year-end (like today).

Report
Mixxy · 01/08/2013 21:30

A picture of an office? WTF?

Report
DHtotalnob · 01/08/2013 21:33

just a thought - does he also own some of the company? Owner managed small firms sometimes have to micromanage to that extent, especially if there's is a debt or cashflow issue.

Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 21:33

so u think this is weird yes?

OP posts:
Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 21:34

he isnt answering txts now but keeps sending random ones like the last one was zzzzzz and when i asked what was happening he hasnt replied.

OP posts:
Report
Doozle06 · 01/08/2013 21:34

Maybe one of the parties isn't available tomorrow so they need to get it done tonight.
Not sure why I'm making excuses for him, I'd think it was pretty suss myself...

Report
reggiebean · 01/08/2013 21:40

Just recently had a mate who was dealing with the same situation in his job, and yes, deadlines were constantly being moved and rearranged. I'm sure it's nothing to worry about x

Report
PrincessCork · 01/08/2013 21:54

i think im being silly. sure if he was up to no good he would just say h has to stay away tonightbyet he messaged to say he was coming home whatever times hey finish.

OP posts:
Report
futuredad · 01/08/2013 22:01

OP - I know from first hand experience that deals like this are often sorted out with "all-nighters" (usually at a solicitor's office) while the various documents - hundreds, if not thousands of pages, are run through with the proverbial fine tooth comb.

If your DP only needs to do one all-nighter he will be able to count themselves lucky. The most recent one I was involved in took at least three of them!

Report
DHtotalnob · 01/08/2013 22:05

an all-nighter just for remortgaging? really?

however, if he's making the effort to come home then that sounds much more likely to be true. you (I) live and learn ........

Report
Chubbymomie2012 · 01/08/2013 22:18

ok. Thamks peepsmi feel much better now having talked it over. xxx

Report
futuredad · 01/08/2013 22:20

DHtotal - it would probably be better to describe it as "refinancing" and it is far more detailed a process than someone re-mortgaging their house.

It wouldn't be that much of a stretch for this deal to involve a number of different banks, each with their own sets of documents for signing for facilities into the "high-tens" of millions - if not more.

Report
LittlePeaPod · 01/08/2013 22:39

Depends on the deal and very much depends on the deadline but its not unusual for deals to run late into the night.. All depends on what the business is doing really.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.