Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Feeling pretty teary though wonder if I am being selfish

(27 Posts)
MissStrawberry Tue 30-Jul-13 18:14:38

I needed a friend the other week and texted a friend. She replied she was out with friends and about to eat so I said would talk later. She later acknowledged that she felt she wasn't there for me when I needed her. (I rarely ask for support and it would have been clear I needed some.) I didn't mention it when I replied to her letter as tbh I am fed up of feeling like I have to put her feelings first even when I do need support but didn't want to bring it up again.

Today I had devastating news so texted an initial hi, how are you text. Didn't want to send a big text if she wasn't going to get it or be in a position to reply. I get back that she has been to hospital and really needs to go to bed. I say to her to rest and we will talk later. I ask if all okay.

I know I could have told her my news and asked for support and my choice not too. My choice to put her first. But tbh I feel like crap after the bad news and just wish I did have support.

I can take it if I should just ask for help even if she has had a tough day too but really don't want a massive kicking tbh. My MH can't take it today after the news I have had.

MissStrawberry Tue 30-Jul-13 20:13:07

I would never text out of the blue to say I needed a friend. Would be horrible to reach out to someone and get nothing back - as happened before and it so upsetting. The normal text first to see if they are free, etc works better for me.

MissStrawberry Tue 30-Jul-13 20:14:24

Also if I text normally, they reply something dramatic or bad news I will immediately support them and not mention my troubles. Seems like the decent thing to do.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now