Been married for 7 years, together 8, 4 dc between us (2 togther, had one each when we met) ranging in age 15 - 4.
When i stopped work to have the two youngest, he would go out to work between 11am and 3pm typically (supposed to be 9-5), sometimes less. He is a sales rep, so is flexible but plays it to the limit. Has got caught and fired several times. I eventually figured if our dc were to have any kind of childhood (holidays, nice clothes, the things all their friends have) I needed to go back to work ft and be the main breadwinner because he is hopeless. Been back at work 2.5 years now, earning well and under a fair amount of pressure. When i initially went back to work i figured, as for years he had worked 11-3 he could do school runs, and prepare an evening meal. He failed spectacularly, i would arrive home and find tortillas with cucumber and grated cheese for tea for 6 people, or something so awfully burnt as to be inedible and i would then have to cook something for the dc.
he is twatting about in the garage now with a drill, doing god knows what while i am working from home. I get up at 6-6.30am every day and work until 6pm, he gets up about 7.30 and spends the first 2 hours smoking and having coffee. I pay for an au pair to help me with the children now. whenever i do ask him to do something he makes the least possible effort, and does just the bare minimum. I cant complain he hasnt done it, but i usually have to do it all again as he has done a crap job (like getting the washing in, won't fold, just screws it up neatly, you know what i mean).
I would leave him if it werent for the dc, but i dont want to break up the family. Leaving him might make me happy, but would ruin everyone else's life so would be utterly selfish. and if the dc werent happy, i wouldnt be either.
if i try to bring this up with him he gets very angry, slams doors and storms off in a wheel spinning cloud of exhaust fumes.
he just doesnt seem to have any kind of work ethic and expects a free ride through life, off me and off his parents.
thanks for reading, moan over. If anyone has anything constructive to say please do, but quite frankly i just want to punch him in the face right now.
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Relationships
Sick of my lazy arse husband
Imabadmum · 22/07/2013 16:44
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