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Do all men do this??

(29 Posts)
welshharpy Wed 17-Jul-13 20:29:35

Hi all, this is a small niggle that hubbie does that drives me up the wall and I am beginning to wonder if it is just a typical bloke 'thing'?

An example was last weekend we went out to an event with some friends, I had a programme with the order of events and hubbie asked me which was on next. I looked in the programme and answered him, he immediately frowned then asked the person sat on his other side. She gave him the same answer, he says ok and that is that. I immediately said very loudly that I just told him the same thing and I wasnt lying, he comes up with some pathetic excuse and thinks no more of it.

I was absolutely effing seething! Problem is, he does this a lot. Doesn't like my answer so will ask anyone else aswell and choose to believe them even if its the same answer! I do not know if the thinks I'm bloody lying or I am wrong but tbh I am so upset because if feels as though he thinks my opinion isn't worth shit.

Is this normal for blokes to completely disregard their wives/partners opinion?? In most other ways I would have to say hubbie is great but this is one thing that really pisses me off and we end up arguing about it, his excuse is always along the lines of 'well I didn't realise that' or 'well I wasn't sure' etc etc.

DonutForMyself Thu 18-Jul-13 10:32:00

My ex did it all the time, we worked together and he would often credit one of the staff with a great idea, only for me to point out that it had been my idea several days ago.

Current DP will take my word and even if he's not sure or I am hesitant and not 100% confident in my answer, he will say "you're probably right because you're a clever lady".

LTB grin (only half joking)

mummytime Thu 18-Jul-13 10:40:58

Thanks tigerlilygrr and Walkacrossthesand. I don't know why Imnotscareditsonlytheinternet's problem is - some cultures do operate very differently - its not racist to say so; there is even a science around it, anthropology.

Admittedly this is irrelevant to the OP, as I don't think it is cultural in her DH's case.
She probably needs to discuss with him how it makes her feel etc. Then if he doesn't change/try ... LTB? It would drive me mad.

anklebitersmum Thu 18-Jul-13 10:50:57

Mine does it. Recent one was "we need to go straight on not left here"
Ignored. Continues to follow sat nav, turns left. 1/2 mile later sees the sign saying 'No access to XYZ do not follow sat nav'.

I made 'the smug face' all the way home. grin

or...(my personal pet hate)

Hubby (while I'm houseworking) "what can I do to help?
Me "Running the hoover round would be great"

Hubby hovers looks about, hovers some more..then

"so what can I help with?"

Me (internally) The f-ing hoovering knobby
instead "I don't know, you're an adult..find something"

slug Thu 18-Jul-13 11:33:04

To some extent it's cultural. I used to team teach with a male colleague. Our students were almost all male and came from a South East Asian background. They would ask me how to do something, listen, ask questions, then 5 minutes later would check with my colleague. The colleague was the one who noticed it first. He made a point of repeating exactly what I had said.

We didn't really blame the students, it was unconscious, but they came from a culture that is highly patriarchal. They simply couldn't take anything a woman said seriously, especially when it came to something technical (we were teaching computing). I notice something similar amongst some of DH's more unreconstructed drinking buddies. Women's voices simply don't appear to register with them, especially if they are being witty/clever/making a joke.

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