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anyone got back with xh?

(8 Posts)
Dontletthemgetyoudown Wed 17-Jul-13 16:19:28

Its a real possibility. We've been divorced for a couple of years but after a stressful last week or two and him being a great support things are looking good for the future.

Can it work? Does it work? There was no one else involved in our split I was pregnant with dc 4 (complete shock 100% not planned in any way) and he felt id tricked him into having dc4. Fast forward 4 years and hes incredibly apologetic for his actions and words and now sees what a fool hed been.

ImperialBlether Wed 17-Jul-13 16:23:16

Have either of you had other partners in the intervening time?

How fair was he with money during the split?

How fair was he with taking care of the children, allowing you to have free time during the split?

Did he turn nasty at any time at all?

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 17-Jul-13 16:25:17

Good luck. I couldn't forgive someone who walked out on me just for getting inconveniently pregnant and selfishly left me to raise 4 kids single-handed but,.. each to their own I suppose. hmm

ImperialBlether Wed 17-Jul-13 16:28:03

Did you trick him into having DC4?

MadAboutHotChoc Wed 17-Jul-13 16:52:19

Did he leave for someone else?

Lweji Wed 17-Jul-13 19:41:37

If you are thinking of getting back, thread very carefully.
He's already walked out on you, and the dc, once.

If he's serious, he'll wait and do his best to reassure you through actions.

NatashaBee Wed 17-Jul-13 19:47:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dontletthemgetyoudown Wed 17-Jul-13 21:20:37

No I didn't trck him into getting pregnant due to my weight at the time I couldn't take the pill but we were using condoms. The last thing I wanted was to be pregnant and as it had taken two years to conceive the other 3:dc each time a fluke was the last thing I thought would happen.

We have both had partners since he has had one who he was with for about 18 months. I have had two long term partners. Split with the last one about 6 months ago he never met the children as I knew it wasn't going anywhere so we just met when thr children were st xh's.

Hes always been more thsn fair with money and looking after the dc. He pays a substantial amont each month although I do work too. He has them every other weekend and usually has them after school bringing the younger ones home ready for bed once or twice a week. Dc are now 16, 11, 7 & 3.

Other than the initial arguments hes been fine since. He has asked a few times if I would consider taking him back over the years. He did ask to try again a couple of months after he left but I was too hurt and too cautious about getting hurt again to agree.

We've become good friends since and have had family days out etc and I think that's my biggest worry s that being a couple would somehow wreck that.

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