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Found on DP tablet...

(349 Posts)
Kione Tue 16-Jul-13 15:56:03

A series of flirting conversations with old friends, one or two with whome he's had sex. I have been with him 7 years had DD in 2009, these chats are from 2010,11 Dec. 2013...
and one dodgy conversation about his phone being left under the sofa at one of his colleages (female) house. It might be the night they had the xmas party when he told me he stayed at the hotel where the party was. But I am not sure. Even if it wasnt the night of the party, he has never mentioned going to her house.
If you remember me, we havent been getting on that great, and we went through a stage where I didnt feel like having sex with him...
So I am so confused. Should I confront him? how'??
I only opened his tablet cos our computer is being repaired, fb wad open with these chats. I am sure many more could have been deleted...
I dont know how to feel right now sad

Doha Thu 25-Jul-13 18:12:21

Delighted to hear you got the job. Is it local?

How did your DP react when he was asked to prove he wasn't with her. Just watch he doesn't get a mate to say he stayed/shared with him as alibi

3HotCrossBuns Thu 25-Jul-13 18:32:43

Yes congrats on the new job, brilliant to have something positive at this time to focus on.

And good luck with whatever 'evidence' is produced - I agree that you should be careful that its not another cover-up.

Kione Thu 25-Jul-13 19:49:22

He said he will prove it to me. I dont care what he does, says, reacts, whatever. If he doesent prove it, I am out.

Kione Thu 25-Jul-13 19:50:44

Doha, what do you mean is it local?
Its actually the job I was doing a few months bak I loved it but my contract finished.

Doha Thu 25-Jul-13 19:57:53

Oh l just wondered if you had to move away for this job--sorry l didn't realise it was a job you had done in the past. Is it permanent or contract. Either way well done. smile

mumat39 Thu 25-Jul-13 20:38:54

Congratulations Kione! That's brilliant news! So so happy for you!

Some thanks and wine for you!


clodhopper13 Thu 25-Jul-13 20:42:01

HE IS A LIAR, What else do you need to know? This is destroying you and all your sanity and self esteem. Tell him to fuck the fuck off with his lies and get some dignity back

Kione Thu 25-Jul-13 20:52:57

Doha, its a year contract but they are trying to make it permanent. It is local yes.

Kione Thu 25-Jul-13 20:53:35

mumat39, thank you. I am over the moon smile xx

Kione Thu 25-Jul-13 20:55:56

Clod, I am giving him a chance. And I cant prove he is lying either! he agrees everything looks fishy and will give me an explanation. If not, I am out.

mumat39 Fri 26-Jul-13 00:08:41

And so you should be! You needed some good news and here it is, and it's all your very own. Not for you as a mummy or a partner, just for Kione! I think it's probably just the boost you needed.

When do you start?

chaosagain Fri 26-Jul-13 08:29:34

Congratulations on your job, Kione. Couldn't have come at a more welcome time, I imagine.

I can't imagine how he'll prove that he stayed at the hotel when his phone was under her sofa, he's not on their records and 'doesn't know' who he shared a room with.

Thinking of you and whatever's ahead, I hope you can keep focused on what's best for you and your future. X

OctopusPete8 Fri 26-Jul-13 08:32:01

I would have thought the fact the hotel he was adamant he stayed turned out he'd not been there seems odd,even if carried in drunk, he will have woke up and seen somebody?

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 10:06:50

mumat39, the year contract starts on the 27th of august but since I am ready to work immediatelly they are going to try an employ me through an agency until that date. It is the boost I needed, and to know I will have an income in case I wove out is a huge relief!

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 10:10:32

chaos, he says is going to ask the last two people he remembers being with, both guests that came over.from other coutries to the party. He tried to contact one of them yesterday and was told that he is off work as his father is in hospital. So I will have to wait a bit more. But I am not as obsessed as I have my job again and I am also looking for a ball gown as my mate has invited me to her company's summer ball smile

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 10:13:26

Octopus, I find that very odd too. He says the guests might have left to catch early flights back. It is a pissibility, and I just have to wait and see. Also as I havent found a decent flat yet and HAVE to stay here, might as well give him the chance to explain things. But I am still looking believe me.

Jan45 Fri 26-Jul-13 10:15:50

Well done on the job and good luck, at least he is now seeing it from your point of view.

schmarn Fri 26-Jul-13 10:53:43

Be careful Kione. When he says he will prove it to you, that sounds very much to me as if he will try to find someone at work willing to lie and say that he shared a room with them. If he had a genuine alibi, he should be able to tell you NOW who that person is. To my mind, it will confirm his guilt and duplicity if he magically finds someone to corroborate his story. Don't forget that he wasn't going to tell you anything until you produced your hotel evidence and now, all of a sudden, he is going to unearth some proof for you. It's horse sh*t.

schmarn Fri 26-Jul-13 10:56:51

I give him credit for his ingenuity, though. Note how he is going to get evidence from people who are overseas so that you can't confront them and check his story out. He is a piece of work.

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 11:00:02

This people are important clients of his company. They are not mates and he can not ask them to lie for him. I also told him I expect to be able to contact them somehow. I can get their details easily but I wouldnt want to do this behind DP back. I will if I need to tho.

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 11:00:12

This people are important clients of his company. They are not mates and he can not ask them to lie for him. I also told him I expect to be able to contact them somehow. I can get their details easily but I wouldnt want to do this behind DP back. I will if I need to tho.

mumat39 Fri 26-Jul-13 13:46:40

Hi Kione, how are you today?

It sounds like your new employers really value you!

About the hotel etc., Would his company really expect their important clients to share a room? I used to travel alot with work and stayed in lots of hotels from travelodges to 5 star ones. In all of those, I always had to give my name.

The only times I didn't was when I visited DP who was working abroad in Singapore and Amsterdam. In those instances he was the guest so the hotel didn't need my details. I found that odd, so you OH's story just does not stack up. Sorry.

C4ro Fri 26-Jul-13 14:06:56

I don't like that he can't remember whose room he stayed in. Plus the weirdness of the female friends SMS/ emails with you about the phone. Even accepting he could have been pissed enough to black out at the time he went to bed, you wake up sober no?

In a tiny defence though, I have borrowed a male colleagues second bed in a twin room back in my 20s. There is no chance the hotel had my name or any idea I was there. Nothing happened between us- it really was just a crash pad after a night out that went on too long for me to bother to go home. BUT: we were friends, I certainly remember his name and neither of us had other-halves to potentially make it weird or upsetting to anyone. Still not close to the situation you're in.

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 14:11:48

mumat39 no they dont expect them to share rooms. He says they must have taken him there unplanned because he was so drunk. Also I didnt say those important clients are the ones he shared room with, they sre the last ones he remembers having a drink with so they might know what happened after that

Kione Fri 26-Jul-13 14:25:40

C4ro, he says no, he didnt wake up sober hence why he took a taxi home the next morning. He says that there was no one in the room when he woke up.

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