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Been told by a young colleague today that people don't date now

(57 Posts)
Sherbert37 Thu 13-Jun-13 23:36:26

Colleague in his late 20s was telling me how people go straight to fooling around in bed or having sex, then text and flirt after and never really date now. Is this really true? Would a 40 year old man expect that too or are the generations so different? Colleague couldn't believe I hadn't been out with anyone since my marriage broke up several years ago. I can't imagine doing what he described. Gulp!

MadBusLady Sun 16-Jun-13 10:15:47

I don't think there's any such thing as a right or wrong way, only right or wrong men. You can carefully and formally "date" a twat or fall straight into bed with an amazing man - I know, done both! I don't think you should feel compelled to choose one path though, as CitizenOscar says, a mix may be appropriate, depending on what feels comfortable with a particular man. Have fun smile

MadBusLady Sun 16-Jun-13 10:17:17

Also, 16yos never know as much as they say they do grin

HollyBerryBush Sun 16-Jun-13 10:18:13

Would a 40 year old man expect that too or are the generations so different?

I think it depends on the man. We have a friend (46) who joined a dating site, he was absolutely horrified at the amount of women who put out within an hour of meeting him. He simply isn't like that, he'd rather know someone before that level of intimacy. He just thought the whole online thing was a shagfest so went up the more traditional methods of meeting real people through friends.

WeAllHaveWings Sun 16-Jun-13 10:18:17

My niece is 20 and dates first for a couple/few weeks, so do most of her friends. She's had 3 longer relationships of 9-12 months and a few snogs/dates in between.

Dating is still happening (here in Scotland anyway!)

YoungBritishPissArtist Sun 16-Jun-13 10:38:36

I don't remember people using the term 'dating' in the 90s and early 00s, it was 'going out with' or 'seeing' each other. I'm 34.

Do British people date in the same way Americans do?

Scruffey Sun 16-Jun-13 10:40:52

I think that going straight to bed is fine in the scenario that there is a bunch of young people who are friends and a pair of them hook up. Point being that they already know each other. Or a friend of a friend.

However I don't think going straight to bed with a complete stranger you have just met is advisable. Someone you know nothing about etc, I don't like the idea of that and will advise my dcs not to do this.

Sherbert37 Sun 16-Jun-13 11:00:08

Scruffey, that pretty much sums up my thoughts. I would be horrified if my three did that (and I really don't think they would), so why would I?

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