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Please help...anyone moved out and stayed together?

(11 Posts)
runforest Tue 28-May-13 11:53:37

As its something I feel I need to do.

But its not something my dp is too happy with.

We have had a rocky time of things and I feel it might help us, he see's it as a step backwards.

I moved in with him a couple of years ago, rented my place out.

My tennants are moving out next month and I am feeling room for us both to breathe might be good.

Anyone had experience of this?

positivementalcatitude Tue 28-May-13 12:43:07

Hello. I moved out when we realised that our relationship was going to crumble to dust if we carried on the way we were going. I was paranoid and clingy and needy, and it was more his decision than mine but i went along with it as I wanted us to fix our relationship. And it was so hard to go. I was away for just under a year, we still dated and saw each other at weekends but it was a chance to start fresh. I moved back in 18 months ago smile PM me if you need me.

runforest Tue 28-May-13 13:05:01

positive Thank you so much for your reply, I don't know how to pm ?!

I am being exactly the same, paranoid, and insecure and generally not feeling like myself. I know thats not the real me if that doesn't sound silly!

Its great you moved back and all is good, that really helps me to feel positive.


positivementalcatitude Tue 28-May-13 14:26:20

Just talk to me on here then if you like. Yep, i was the same as you and it nearly ruined us. A break, or moving out, is not always for the worst x

calypso2008 Tue 28-May-13 14:30:36

Doesn't work in my opinion. You just grow apart and things are never the same.

I've done it twice, both times it was simply to lessen the pain of a complete breakup straight away (in hindsight)

It is indeed a step back and probably means you shouldn't be together sad Sorry. Relationships should not be hard work.

Dededum Tue 28-May-13 14:31:16

DH got a job in Paris, he needed to move out. We commuted at the weekends and after a year he got a job back in London and now 13 years later we are married with 2 boys.

sammisatt Tue 28-May-13 14:37:41

Yes! I moved out for 2 years and remained together. It was hard moving back in but we are still together with 2 kids 3 years after moving back in.

SteamPink Tue 28-May-13 15:37:01

Worked for us. DP went through a phase of depression, heavy drinking, and staying out all night being completely disrespectful after being made redundant. I responded by being very stressed and almost hysterically paranoid and confused. I asked him to move out after a particularly bad break, and almost a year later he's employed and solvent, I'm happy, and we still live separately. We plan to move in together again in a year or so.

tethersend Tue 28-May-13 15:41:46

Do you have kids?

runforest Tue 28-May-13 15:47:37

Thanks so much for your replies, I was feeling so confused, my head saying one thing, and my heart the other.

tethersend no we don't have any kids, which I guess makes things easier to try this?

TheChaoGoesMu Tue 28-May-13 16:06:13

It worked for us. I moved out for a year and then we got a new place together for a new start. That was quite a few years ago and we went on to have a family and live happily ever after.

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