After many years of EA and it coming to a head in recent months, I decided to start the Freedom Programme online. My H is very receptive to changing his behaviour and has wholeheartedly apologised for much of what happened in the past (mostly shouting, swearing - but this was getting worse. he can also be controlling). he saw how much it affected me in terms of my anxiety and the fact i was falling out of love - not surprisingly.
Anyway - I told him about the FP men's online course and he agreed to do it himself. I am hugely impressed by this and feel that it finally shows some measure of acceptance of his behaviour. I really hope it will change some aspects of our relationship and improve those parts which are good.
Much of what is on this relationships board is negative about marriages. I am hoping to show that it can get better. I reached rock bottom and was close to leaving him and he knew that. Maybe I was hoovered and perhaps it won't last, but I would like to document the journey.
I hope the FP won't do any harm - he is nowhere near as bad as the examples in the Dominator book - but there are some areas where it describes him to a tee. Control of money, house discipline, explosions of rage out of the blue etc. Control of my body, insults (disguised as "caring") silent treatment and other manipulative techniques. Oh and ranting, raving and lecturing (it is this I hate the most).
So we will see. I am hopeful but still just a little cynical. I think that is the right approach...
I can't reply over the weekend - but will come back on Monday with an update.
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Relationships
Doing freedom Programme with H - want to share a hopefully happy outcome
writergal · 17/05/2013 07:12
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