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Advice on seperating

(2 Posts)
blah1234 Tue 14-May-13 00:03:05

Just found out that bf has been addicted to dating/sex websites for the best part of the last 3 years. We have been together for 5.

Currently at counciling as I thought I had discovered him using these websites sporadically over the past couple if years. Turns out it was constant. He has spent the best part of 4k in the past year alone getting messages from these sites.

I am planning to LTB. We both called in sick today as up till 6am fighting about it. Him denying stuff and me eventually getting the truth.

What's the deal with changing the locks while he is at work tomorrow? The mortgage is in 2 names but last night in a effort to get his phone back he pinned me up against the wall and twisted my wrist till I had no feeling in it. All 3 neighbouring flats would have heard me scream and scream to get off me. (Windows open.) I am happy in involve police if STRICTLY necessary to change locks.

I have also managed to get hold of his itemised phone bills which show him calling these no's. Would I be mad to print off all of the last 12 months and send to inlaws? He is total golden child and all the split would be blamed on me. I want them to see reality.

Also he has high powered job in city. Job has always come above me. He has some days been texting various women constantly during the work day (think lunch time till 10pm) and must have been wanking off in the toilet. I have sacrificed soooooo much for his career. WIBU to fwd bills to boss?

Hope this makes some sense. Very sleep deprived. Would love any advice.

BabyHMummy Tue 14-May-13 07:54:04

I wouldn't involve his boss hun and unfortunately by law you cannot change the locks if the mortgage is in both names. The law states if you do you have to give him a key. He can break in legally otherwise as long as when he is done he makes the property secure again.

If he has been violent your only option is the police and a restraining order to keep him away from you and the property.

As joint owners he has right of access which means he can turn up any time night or day and there is nothing you can do.

I know this as my stbx has tried changing locks st pur house when I left him and I saw solicitor and spoke to the police.

Sorry I know this isn't what you wanted to hear.

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