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Help me see the beauty again

(10 Posts)
atosilis Sat 11-May-13 10:11:05

i had a lovely, lovely friend who took her own life nearly a year ago- I miss her very much.

Shortly before she died I visited her for the weekend and we saw a picture in a gallery that I fell in love with but couldn't afford. She tried to get the assistant to come down in price but couldn't. She said, "buy it atosilis, it will bring you joy everyday and you need joy."

I couldn't remember the name of the artist or gallery but often thought of that day and the painting.

This week I found the gallery's business card in my bag! I have looked and looked and looked again during the year! With the help of the web, I have located the painting and bought it out of MY savings. I wish I could ring her and tell her to come and see it when it arrives.

My husband has gone mad with rage -

- I didn't discuss it with him first
- I'm bound to have been conned over the price
- I've thrown my money away
- I didn't see her very often
- why be reminded of a suicide every time I look at it?

I know he's going to criticise it and hate it. My joy at the picture is now dulling with sadness. Help me get the joy back, please. :-(

MushroomSoup Sat 11-May-13 10:22:06

Oh how wonderful! You are entitled to spend your savings on something that YOU love. You are allowed to see beauty in something even if your H does not. You are allowed to decide how much you are willing to spend on a thing of beauty and, if H thinks you've been stung, it doesn't matter.
I too lost a friend (through an accident) and the thing of beauty that reminds me of her is a daffodil! So cheap and cheerful, but so full of memories I'd pay thousands for a bunch.

Hang that picture with pride. The issue is not the picture, or what you have spent, or that you didn't ask permission - the issue is you have an unsupportive H.

MushroomSoup Sat 11-May-13 10:23:38

And I think your friend WILL know you have the picture!

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE Sat 11-May-13 10:25:10

You will see the beauty. Sometimes things truly are worth their cost, no matter how high.

When you look at it you will be reminded of your friend and the joy she brought you. That is priceless.

Dahlen Sat 11-May-13 10:25:35

What's your H like otherwise? Is he generally supportive?

Could it be that your H is worried about you and feels the painting will drag you down? Or is the case that he takes the shine off everything that brings you happiness?

atosilis Sat 11-May-13 10:29:33

Thank you!

I didn't tell him the price, I said, " the price is irrelevant, it's value to me is huge.

I will hang it where it can catch the sun, which is how it caught our eyes in the first place.

atosilis Sat 11-May-13 10:30:53

Dahlen, your final question is the situation.

atosilis Sat 11-May-13 10:32:50

Actually that's not fair, if it brings him happiness too he's fine.

atosilis Sat 11-May-13 10:34:02

Got to go downstairs and face the day but thanks for the messages :-)

itwillgetbettersoon Sat 11-May-13 10:43:00

I think it is a wonderful thing that you have done. Enjoy the picture and remember your lovely friend. Ignore your husband it is none of his business.

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