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WAS am i in the right or in the wrong

20 replies

spashy · 08/05/2013 21:31

his is my first post on this site.
and i really need some guidance.
i have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and im in my very late 20s.
he is considerably older than me in his 40s. he lives with his mother and his family.
he is my first boyfriend. and he has had a few gf in the past now that is ok.
a few months ago he introduced me to his parents.
his family are nice but the mother told me that she has seen enough gfs come and go.
ok well i understood what she was trying to say.

my boyfriend had a ex that was mental unstable that did some very nasty things towards him

anyway one day the mother told me that anything i can say to her she wont say back to my boyfriend and she told me she couldnt understand why he was with for so long.

so a few days later when i was alone with her. i explained that he was with her for a few months because she told him she was pregnant.

well well she screamed at me. and roared at me saying he cant have kids and that im a sly person for saying that. and she got the brother he is older than the brother and he and her marked my cards.
well i mean that they hated me for saying that and i nearly walked out on the house as they were vile and nasty to me.

they never no i mentioned this squabble to my boyfriend.
i noticed ever since then after the night the mother was a bit crass but the brother was a bit cruel he never added me on fb.

which i dont care. writes how much he loves his other brother gf. now lets call my boyfriend brother bob. now bob is gay and that is who he is.

in the past few months after that he hiss at me when the boyfriend out of the room told him i crossed him at that night. just hate my guts basically
now i apogise to the mother for saying it but i think i was so desperate back then for them to like me. i know i sound so sad.

a few times he pushed my buttons and he then remarked somthing like a tart and a scumbag to me .
i told my boyfriend i cant be dealing with this anymore. and im overweight and i have warned my boyfriend that bob says anything about my weight that i be so furious.

a few weeks rolled by and i advoided them and then i had a work study trip and still avoided going over there .

but one night i happened to notice that bob. wrote on social networking site saying that my brother gf is so fat and he wrote very mean things and his friends joined in with the laugh. and of course my boyfriend family and friends could see what he wrote about me.

well i was furious and i shared his status to his other brother gf.
a few days later after it was still up he took it down and he knew i seen what he had wrote as i shared the status.

the boyfriend told his mother what he wrote and she went : he went to far now. and he shouldnt be drinking and writing up stuff like that coz its just the drink talk
the next day i was invited over to dinner in the mother house and i didnt want to go so i made the effort brought up some treats.

fter a few hours they were talking about bob and i mentioned that he tooked down his status and it was about time. as he humilated me
and i was very destressed on what he said i said that i shared the status to his other brother gf as i wanted to show her what he is like to me.
well she roared at me. saying i annoyed him some times which i do admit only because he called me a tart and scumbag. she said take it up with him and not in my house..

now i do agree it maybe wasnt the place but i was never have any dealing with bob outside of their home.

the next day he arrived back from his hoilday and he was grinning and humming and acting like nothing had happened

this family dont take any shit from anyone so i decided i was going to stand up to them because what they did was wrong to me and i wasnt going to let them get away with it.
my boyf offered me a drink and i told him :no thanks im on a diet with that the mother roared at me saying i was bringing up what happened . what was wrote

and i turned around to him i said bob you hulimated me on what you wrote and im not pleased. the mother screamed at me . and bob told me i shouldnt looking at his page and i said it was on a public feed and it was about me.
next thing i could feel him i think starting to laugh at me and the mother was shouting i think she was saying i was a trouble maker.

well i just went like . im done im finished im sick of you and your snide remarks i was so hurt what you have written about me and i dont want any part now. i said im getting the bus. and i walked out of the house very upset .
the boyfriend ran after me . but i wasnt happy
so i got into the car and i was very upset i was crying shaken after a while. his mother rang seeing was i alrite.

i had calmed down a bit at that stage. i warned my boyfriend what would happen if i saw them and i was not going to let him write what he thinks of me and expect to get away with that anymore.

i was thought to confront a bully you have to stand up to them.
so after a while my boyfreind suggested that i apogise to his mother. as it the fight happened in her house. so i agreed

so i went back to the house about 50 mins after i walked out of the house.
saying im sorry about the fight and it wont happen again.

and she said to bob saying your were at fault and what do you say to orange. he was on his phone and just went "sorry" and went back to his phonecall . but at least it was somthing however i was hoping some sort of apology on fb but i can forget about that now

i really want to distance myself from them but its hard that mother told me im glad i came back that night and i replyed thand s for taking me back there are a very odd family that love talking about his exs to me . except the last ex.

i just feel very drained i feel a bit guilty for doing this to his mother but at the same time i felt i had to make a stand do you think it was wrong of me or would you have done the same thing?

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Leverette · 08/05/2013 21:36

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Moanranger · 08/05/2013 21:39

Did not read whole post, but do NOT confide in Bf mother! Serious boundary issues here. Stop.