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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

i dont know how to feel ok

20 replies

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 14:59

i feel like i might be having a bit of a crisis. i dont know what to do about it

i think ive had a bit of a realisation today, but just feel a bit paralized

i kept thinking it was because i was over weight/ i didnt have enough time/ the house is a mess/ couldnt give the kids enough time etc etc. i keep obsessing about 'other stuff'

and feeling shit, because i havent been able to make myself better. have been at home today, crying. i feel like my heart is racing and im hyperventilating a bit

OP posts:

Report

CogitoErgoSometimes · 07/05/2013 15:01

What have you realised?

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 15:08

oh, that made no sense at all did it. I am seperated from my XH for a year. I felt relief when he went for some months. But Ive been getting sadder and sadder. He is an alcoholic, mostly in recovery. We cant be together, but I have realised that I am sad, really sad about our seperation. And its got F all to do with my weight etc etc etc Ive been trying to control aspects of my life, to try and make myself feel better and failing and then feeling worse...

I feel like everything is tumbling down on top of me today. I not sure how to feel ok enough to go and get the kids. Im feeling really shaky and paranoid

I was waiting for some counselling to deal with something that happened in my past. Ive been waiting 18 months. That gets bigger and bigger in my head all the time

i feel a bit mental
maybe i just need to sleep for a bit

OP posts:

Whowhowhoswho · 07/05/2013 15:08

It is anxiety. What are you anxious about.?

Sit down and take some slow deep breaths.

Whowhowhoswho · 07/05/2013 15:10

We posted at the same time.

Go and see your gp. Xxxx

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 15:12

i went to the doctor last week. She gave me some iron tablets

what can they do for anxiety anyway? tell me to relax/ take time for myself?

OP posts:

Whowhowhoswho · 07/05/2013 15:26

Depending on how bad the anxiety is you can go on medication. Or try herbal remedy like kalms. St. John's wort.
Are you sleeping well?

Whowhowhoswho · 07/05/2013 15:26

If you Are on iron tablets you are anaemic. This could be the cause of you feeling shaky

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 15:29

i want to sleep all the time.

OP posts:

CogitoErgoSometimes · 07/05/2013 15:39

Chronic fatigue can be another symptom of anaemia. Can be other things of course. Did they check your blood-sugars at the GP for example? Do they know you're hyperventilating, feeling shaky and so on?

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 15:43

yes, they checked my blood sugar and a number of other things. They dont know about hyper ventilating..thats only happened today. I think i underplayed the 'stress' and focused on my physical 'symptoms'

i think i was wrong to do that. I dont feel i can go back, and say 'actually..'

OP posts:

Joy5 · 07/05/2013 15:45

It could be depression, anti depressants helped me when i had similar symptoms. Still do if i'm honest, but they're getting less and less now. I'm also feeling sad, been divorced since February, separated for 18 months, think its only now i'm starting to feel better that the real feelings are coming out.

Know the symptoms that when i'm down, everything else seems to be a problem too, then i need to take it easy spend more time with my younger sons and friends. Have terrible sleeping problems but when i'm really down i can't sleep enough. Other people have suggested seeing your GP, i can't emphasise enough how much mine help me. Divorce does cause depression, and can take a long long time to come to terms with. Being low in iron doesn't help depression, it just helps to make the symptoms worse, and the tables take a few weeks to start working properly so give them some more time too.
Sending hugs, its an awful place to be in.

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow · 07/05/2013 15:49

Please go and see your GP. They can help you with anti-anxiety and anti-depression medications - I know no-one likes to take these tablets but sometimes we need them on a short term basis just when everything is getting on top of us.

Make the appointment today and tell the GP everything.

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 15:49

thank you for all your advice

im trying to retrain right now. It is full on. And i cant afford any down time for self pity. I really cant. but i fill like im going to implode

can i just phone GP, and ask for ADs in light of the contact ive already had. I dont like going and spilling my guts face to face. It makes me feel really vulnerable and i dont like it.

At the same time, I wont cry/break down...and then i feel like a fraud

OP posts:

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow · 07/05/2013 15:51

Your GP won't prescribe that kind of medication over the phone. Can you take someone supportive with you to the appointment.

You sound like your on the verge of a breakdown. I know how it feels.

The minute you pick up the phone and make your appointment is the minute your recovery and healing slowly starts.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 07/05/2013 15:54

Hi feeling I just got my first CBT appointment. I didn't have to speak to anyone about what was wrong, I just filled out an online form.

I find it really difficult to tell people how I am actually feeling, so found the online form to be an easy way of doing it.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 07/05/2013 15:54

Do go back to your GP if you've missed anything out that is now important. GPs are human, they've seen it all. They know how difficult some topics can be and that, in the surgery environment, what you meant to say and what you actually say can be very different. They can only diagnose based on the answers you give so, if you have extra information, don't be embarrassed to go back

It's not self-pity to admit that you are overwhelmed. It's being self-aware. Good luck

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 18:07

Thanks everyone. I have spoken with GP now and she is giving me a prescription for ADs. I did cry. So all authentic an' all

I'm a bit worried. Because of the stigma with taking ADs. I'm retraining, to do a job which is considered to be stressful. Will employers consider me unsuitable? Do I have to disclose this? I'm sure I can do it. But I don't know how I would explain away my need to take ADs?

OP posts:

feelingnotright · 07/05/2013 18:11

I have taken ADs for PND before...but I feel like that is more 'acceptable' IYKWIM

OP posts:

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 07/05/2013 18:20

I dont think you have to tell them, and it would be discrimination for them not to hire you on that basis anyway.

Well done for going to your GP.

Joy5 · 07/05/2013 20:28

I've been on AD since the death of my son nearly five years ago, i've not had to declare i'm on medication in job applications so far, and can't see how an employer could find out. I have monthly checkups with my GP, but i just say i have a doctors' appointment to my employer, i've never been asked why i have an appointment.

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