Red flag?

[FennCara]

Friend's long term boyfriend is completely reluctant to take her on holiday, to festivals, nights out, parties etc.

They are recently reconciled after a split. He's keeping her at arms length. Im out of a grim relationship myself and i can appreciate the miserable, rejected feeling.

Do I tell her to get rid or mind my own?

[freddiemisagreatshag]

You can tell her, but she won't listen unless she's in the right place in her head to listen. She won't hear it if she doesn't want to hear it.

[HairyGrotter]

It's really her business, you can be supportive, but that's it. She needs to make her own choices, it doesn't sound great for her though

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

I'm wondering how 'reconciled' squares with not taking your long-term girlfriend on holiday? Are they only reconciled in private where no-one can see, perhaps? Not seeing a 'red flag' excatly, he just sounds like a weirdo that's embarrassed to be out in public with her.

[FennCara]

Exactly, this isn't reconciliation. This is a greater height for a longer fall. Extremely frustrating to watch

[macthecatsmum]

Do not-even when drunk-tell her or any "friends" what you think of the situation or him.I did and lost a friend. Like other people said she has to be in the right place before she can see what's going on. Just be there, listen and be supportive.

[Lweji]

Find an excuse start her on MN Relationships?

We have nothing to lose when telling her to dump his sorry arse.

[Grinkly]

Do I tell her to get rid or mind my own

No, you tell her to take herself to nights out, on holiday, to parties.

Is she a man or a mouse????

Then her DBF can do what the hell he likes, join her? leave her? drop dead?

By then she won't care!