Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Aibu dh rude to mother

(6 Posts)
Ginga66 Wed 01-May-13 00:06:21

Some people will recognise my name and prob tell me I have autistic or ea dh which is prob true but I just want response on one incident pls as cant see wood for trees.
Long story short my mother lives with my forty year old alcoholic brother. He is financially abusing her but she is co dependent and wants someone around.
My brother was ver rude to dh and I some time backand now he and dh do not speak. Dh also does not speak to other brothe for different reasons.
When dh gives n mum a lift they talk about my alcoholic brother. Dh can ge quite bullying verbally, kind of walks people into agreeing with him. M mother can be a people pleased and plays to her audience. Dh suggested changing locks,calling police and social to get brother removed. Mother agreed but didn't really if u know what I mean, she was tired and just wanted to off load.
That was yday on her birthday mind u.
Today he tellsme I'm a crap daughter for not sorting situation and h is going to. Mum had texted t say don do it. I lost temped said I'll leave u if. Do it.
Anywa h proceeded to text m mother and say he felt v angr tha she had manipulated him and basically called he a liar.
Mother v upset says he has been very rude and she on see him now, he won't apologise.
I already barely see brothers but rely on mum or else I'm stuck with mil who is xtremel controlling and thinks sun shines ou of dh arse, prob why he acts as he does. That and absent father syndrome.
I'm actually angry with mum fo leading him on with tale of woe as well as him for being so rude.
Not sure what if nothing to do. Advice pls.

Hissy Wed 01-May-13 00:43:36

Sounds like your MIL isn't the only one that is controlling!

Step back. This is not your fight to get in the middle of. You will never win, only take direct hits and come out bruised and battered and blamed for the whole thing in the end.

Your DM knows the score, your DB does, and your H too. WTF has any of this got to do with you? Why are you getting all this grief? They know what's going on! Leave them to it.

Seriously, tell H that it's not his business, and tbh you don't want to get involved anymore in their soap opera lives.

I think you would be a lot better without the LOT of them.

Longdistance Wed 01-May-13 01:25:35

Leave them to it. I'm with pp, it's not your battle.
Just , leave it, as getting involved will leave you being blamed for everything in the end.

Springdiva Wed 01-May-13 03:00:34

Why is DH getting involved?? Leave DM and DB to it.

And why is DM talking about DB with DH? She needs to stop being manipulated - tell her she s just causing more problems by discussing it with DH. She could just say no she doesn't want to discuss it.

Hopefully it will blow over in a day or so.

Ginga66 Wed 01-May-13 08:27:02

Thanks guys, I doubt it will blow over as all of these are the grudge till the grave type, dh more than anyone. Dm is trying to make me feel guilty for not making dh apologise. Dh is angry for me not taking his side I have a scick ten month old and clingy four year old to deal with. U r al, right I will leave them to it!

Hissy Thu 02-May-13 00:27:59

Tell them ALL to grow the fuck up. I can't abide this pratting about.

Honestly love, do you really want to live with such awful people around you, do you really want to expose your DC to a life like this?

Give some thought to life without all this stress.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: