Ok apologies in advance if this is long!
My sister has suffered with anorexia since she was 12 (for the past 20 years). In that time me and her have become estranged as she is very manipulative and controlling and I didn't want my dc around her. Some of the things she has done in the past to get the attention from our parents onto her and not me include throwing herself down the stairs on my ds christening day, so mum only came to the service not the party. Announcing 6 hours before my wedding that she wasnt coming as she was ill. Meaning my parents spent the whole day upset that she wasn't there to enjoy it. Turning up at the hospital when I was in labour announcing how much she didn't like it then 'fainting' when the mw came to see to me. These are only a very few things, coupled with the fact that she has been in and out of hospital for years and therefore I have always had to play 'second fiddle' and if she is needing a visit I don't get a look in. Times like my dd first birthday party my parents only came for 20 mins, some of their parties they haven't bothered coming to at all.
My mum gets out her frustration by picking on me and picking arguments so that she can release her frustrtion on me not my sister. Whenever she is home I know me and mum will have huge rows which usually end with her saying 'all I do for you' and throwing any tiny thing back in my face down to helping me move house, looking after the dc (about 3 times a year) and stopping to get milk on her way round!
Dh walked out a couple of weeks ago and my parents have not been overly supportive down to asking was it my fault and was I pleased he left. It was a complete shock I have been a mess, dc have been a mess and they have only called round twice (only live 3 miles away and drive).
I text them this morning to ask if they would like to come round after school tomorrow for a coffee and they reply 'lovely can we include your sister'. They know we have no contact, they know I don't want dc around her, they also know they are currently my only form of childcare and that I would have no choice but to text back 'If you want to'. I am now furious with myself I wanted to put NO but I don't have the energy for all of this on top of everything else thats going on at the moment. Now I know they will turn up tomorrow and it wont matter how I am with her whether I ignore her or rush to give her a hug it will be taken in te wrong context and my mum will have a major go at me. All I want is my mum and dad to come round and have a chat about whats going on and give me a little bit of support for a change. What do I do??
Thank you if you stayed to the end, sorry for the spelling and grammar I am crying and cant really see the keyboard x
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What do I do?
2anddone · 28/04/2013 13:13
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