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He's done it AGAIN!!! and what a twat I am

(17 Posts)
NashvilleT Fri 19-Apr-13 11:03:27

He was registered on POF and various "sex chat" sites between October to Jan, only getting rid because I found out. He said it meant nothing and despite the fact that he'd messaged tons of women and got into full on conversations with them, trying to arrange meet ups etc he swore that he never intended to meet anyone, it was all something to do whilst bored at work (despite telling me he's too busy to text me whilst at work, fucker).

I was a stupid twat and forgave him.

In february I found that he'd been registered on a casual sex site and was trying to arrange to meet up with a specific woman on the night that I was working late when he'd told me he'd stay home and keep my kids company - he swore he wasn't really going to meet her despite telling her what time he finished work and would she like him to pick her up in his car or meet somewhere mutual. no - obviously not "really" planning on meeting despite getting the specifics sorted.

We had a huge argument and I told him to jog on. He talked me around, cried, made me feel sorry for the poor messed up little man and I gave him another chance only to then find out that he'd been back on the site twice the following day and 4 times the following weekend!!! but no, he was apparantly just deleting everything off it hmm cos yeah, it takes 6 log ins to do that, right.

He eventually shows me proof of getting rid of this site.

So I'm all sucked in again, we decide to start looking at houses again (we'd put a hold on this) and have arranged to view 3 houses this weekend. He even asked if I'd consider changing my kids' school so we could move further afield -

And guess what I've just found on his laptop - upforit - a site dedicated to casual flings/sex meets etc etc - I didn't even need to snoop for it, the idiot had left the page open, got up late for work and obviously forgot to delete it on his rush out of the door. Absolute nob. He's saying it's a pop up window that comes up when he's downloading movies/games but I think this is bullshit, I've opened the download site 3 times this morning and NO pop up windows have come up.

I'm more annoyed at myself than him. How many times does one have to be shit on before they start smelling the stuff!!! fucking idiot that I am.

BagCat Fri 19-Apr-13 11:05:57

Do not buy a house with this man. Just don't.

Loulybelle Fri 19-Apr-13 11:08:42

Run, Run far away, this man obviously has no intention of ever stopping, because he obviously gets some kind of thrill out of it, dump him and move on.

AMumInScotland Fri 19-Apr-13 11:10:36

On the plus side - at least you know, and before you get a house together.

Is he staying at your place? I'd be packing his bags tbh. You gave him a second chance, and tried your best to believe him, but he has proved that he can't be trusted.

Draw a line under it now.

BOF Fri 19-Apr-13 11:12:31

DO NOT DISRUPT YOUR CHILDREN'S LIVES FOR THIS MAN. It will never work.

yonisparechangemr Fri 19-Apr-13 11:13:33

oh Nashville sad He sounds exactly like my brother! My Dsil put up with it for years as he was "only talking" to them, it wasn't until he gave her herpes that the truth came out. sad He had been meeting up with these slappers for years!

LTB he doesnt respect you enough to be honest or faithful you are worth so much more! flowers x

Loulybelle Fri 19-Apr-13 11:16:27

Yoni, Im curious to the excuse your brother gave for her getting Herpes, and the fact he was having unprotected sex, digusting creature.

NandH Fri 19-Apr-13 11:17:55

OMG....is your dp my dp??!!!

I found my dp on social central (chat,flirt,shag,send nude pics to another kind of site!!) ... this was 10 days after I gave birth to our son and it happened to be Valentines day :-/ ... fucking prick! I've now moved 100miles away from "home" with this man and wish I hadn't, can't forgive him!!!

don't move with him!!!

badinage Fri 19-Apr-13 11:24:42

Obviously dump now and NEVER go back, but FFS spend a bit of time working out why you even considered that he was telling the truth the first time, let alone the second. Or considered disrupting your kids just for this knobber and having a relationship with him. Blokes who are on these sites are there for one reason only and it's never 'boredom at work' or the usual old bollocks excuses of 'curiosity' or 'my mate doing a prank'.

practicality Fri 19-Apr-13 11:26:12

Well better now than later.

Finish it and let Mr Inadequate roam for casual encounters.

Lucky escape for you and your children.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Fri 19-Apr-13 11:29:53

You won't make that mistake again.

yonisparechangemr Fri 19-Apr-13 11:31:54

Louly he admitted it as soon as she was diagnosed, she went to the police to coz the little fucker knew he had it! shock He was charged with ABH

I see there is another thread about this today also? wtf are these men all about? x

yonisparechangemr Fri 19-Apr-13 11:34:43

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1714230-Feeling-sick-found-out-H-had-a-profile-with-photo-on-MarriedAffair-com

Loulybelle Fri 19-Apr-13 11:49:11

wow Yoni,

TalkativeJim Fri 19-Apr-13 12:22:42

Dump him and block him from your life.

Don't even think very hard about it. This situation is SO simple it's astonishing. This guy will make life worse for you and your children, in every way you can think of. Being single is heaven by comparison. Simple as. Get rid. It doesn't matter what he says, don't even waste energy on it that you could be putting into, oh I don't know, doing a crossword or something. Nasty, unfaithful, lying, cheating loser = not required.

yonisparechangemr Fri 19-Apr-13 14:13:22

^ what jim said! wink

Xales Fri 19-Apr-13 14:21:44

Yuck.

Nothing to add but please consider an sti test as you have no idea what he may have actually done.

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