Ok, will try and summarise without too much drip feeding.
DH has one "aquaintance" who I really don't like. He is rude, dishonest, unpleasant and I don't actually think I have every seen him sober in 8 years. He has done many things I don't like but for one, at our wedding he; didn't actually speak to me, was an usher and did nothing at all to help, stole a CRATE of wine from the kitchens (took him 3 attempts because people kept catching and trying to stop him). So anyway. don't think very much of this man and have little to do with him in the last year or so.
DH has now been invited to his stag do and wedding. I have said he can go and its up to him who he wants to be friends with although I would prefer not to have him in my life (I might go to the wedding but in July and DC1 due next week so unsure).
Anyway, he then said, what if this guy wants to pop up and visit? I said, I would prefer not to have him in my home, especially now will have DC.
This then lead to - this makes everything so awkward with him and his other friends and why he hasn't seen them for a while. I was quite .
Now, one friend is mutual and one friend is this chaps brother. However, I think this is completely unfounded and unfair.
I am always suggesting he invites these friends to stay. One was working about an hour away from us for a month and I suggested nearly every day he go to visit, invite the friend to us but he kept saying he was too busy.
The other friend is in the military and when he was serving away, I was the one buying cards to send to him, reminding DH to write, asking when the friend was back so we could meet up etc.
Basically, I have never prevented him seeing either of these too, have encouraged him to keep contact, invite them, visit them. I feel that he has actually been fairly bad at maintaining his friendship and looking to put the blame for this onto me. I also really don't see why, as adults, you would need to share all mutual firends or also be close frineds with your friends brother?
It is hard to be objective so what do others think about this? It is causing a fair few agruements and with the baby due on Monday I could really do without the stress right now.
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DH blaming me for reduced contact with his friends
4 replies
scaredbutexcited · 11/04/2013 15:26
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