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New relationship, what's normal?

(8 Posts)
crapatrelationships Sat 06-Apr-13 19:00:00

NC for this as I suspect I'm being really pathetic. I'm in my early 40s and I've had very few relationships, mainly because childhood wasn't amazing and I have separation anxieties and low self esteem wrt men, relationships etc. I tend to lose my boundaries in the relationship, get needy and panicky.

Thus I've dated a father figure, had two men cheat on me, and another two were emotionally abusive (luckily only saw them for a few months before it fell apart). That's about it.

So after two years of counselling I'm much more sorted out, and have a new boyfriend who seems lovely. We've been seeing each other for 3 months, and just in the last few weeks have been calling it an official 'relationship'.

Problem is, I don't know what a normal relationship is. I'm having a little panic because I think he's losing interest. There isn't a day that has gone by without him texting or emailing me, but the volume is dropping off, and he seems less excited to contact me or see me. He is out with friends both last night and tonight, without me, and I don't know when I'm going to see him again. I admit this dropping off phenomenon is only from Wednesday this week (we spent all Easter weekend together).

Come along and give me a slap if I'm being silly, or let me know if I should worry please. I know I should probably talk to him but I'm too nervous in case he's losing interest already (really don't know what I've done wrong, we had a great weekend last weekend) and that just ends up making it worse.

tumbletumble Sat 06-Apr-13 19:04:18

Chill! Really. This sounds fine to me at the 3 month stage, try not to worry.

Coffee1Sugar Sat 06-Apr-13 19:11:09

Chill! Fact you've had a recent "development" into making it official means you can relax now. Don't worry too much about the next phone call etc. He's clearly very comfortable with you smile

thecatneuterer Sat 06-Apr-13 19:21:20

Consider yourself slapped smile

crapatrelationships Sat 06-Apr-13 19:21:34

Oh gawd I am pathetic aren't I! blush

Thanks.

laura0007 Sat 06-Apr-13 19:26:27

That could have been me posting that! I've been with my new boyfriend 3 months now and he seems less interested in seeing me as time goes on. He still texts or calls everyday, normally after I've text him though. I'm struggling to get him for more than one evening and night at a time though as he's always working. Infuriating!! angry I really really like him though, so trying not to be a needy, pathetic girl!

crapatrelationships Sat 06-Apr-13 19:30:04

It's a horrible feeling isn't it! I hate getting needy ugh.

crapatrelationships Sat 06-Apr-13 19:43:56

Oh dear, I feel like a right twat. He's just texted - he's not going out tonight as he is in bed with a bad migraine. I need to get over myself methinks blush

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