My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

What would you think

9 replies

M0naLisa · 01/04/2013 03:02

If your DH went out drinking with friends and didn't come home until 9am the next day?
'Lost' his phone and couldn't even get in touch to tell you where he was, leaving you worrying about where he was. You ask on Facebook if anyone has seen him and you get told he was last seen leaving pub at 10:30.

He comes home and says 'fell asleep at a mates no big deal'

Would you take that as 'oh ok darling no harm done'

Or 'hmm really?'

Btw he has form of cheating!!

OP posts:
Report
M0naLisa · 01/04/2013 03:05

Also must stress this ISN'T MY HUSBAND!

It's my best friend.

I know he has form as 7 years ago I found something out, told my ex who was my boyfriend at time (in secret I may add) who then told best friend husband (then boyfriend) that I knew something and friends husband told me something happened on a stag weekend away. Others things have happened. He used to do this all the time.

OP posts:
Report
M0naLisa · 01/04/2013 03:05

Best friends husband*

OP posts:
Report
AnAirOfHope · 01/04/2013 03:07

Who did he leave the pub with?

Can friend comfirm?

Is it worth a relationship if the other person stays out, makes you worry and has cheated?

Report
AnAirOfHope · 01/04/2013 03:09

If its not your dh stay out of it and support your friend when she wakes up to the twat.

Report
M0naLisa · 01/04/2013 03:25

I am keeping out of it. I texted her to see if she was ok and she said yeah fine. I spoke to one of our mutual friends who knows what he's like and she said we've just to be there as one day she will wake up to what he's like. :-(

I feel like I'm betraying her as we know something and she doesn't but then if it ever came out that we knew something then would she fall out with us for not telling her but then if we told her do we risk her falling out with us too :-(

Can't win. Just awful seeing her been taken for a fool.

OP posts:
Report
BicBiro · 01/04/2013 11:06

ooh this is so tricky. I can't imagine keeping something like this from my best friend. however I do think there is 'room for doubt' in the info you have so she may choose to ignore it this time. if you get more info which makes it more certain then perhaps reassess the situation?

Report
JaceyBee · 01/04/2013 11:11

Yeah I mean it doesn't look good but you don't actually know what he did, and it looks worse to you only because you know about the previous times, without them it's more plausible that he did genuinely fall asleep at a mates. Some people don't want to see what's in front of them and will just bury their heads in the sand, all can do is be there if/when it all does come out. And maybe you don't have to tell her you had suspicions for years!

Report
SolidGoldBrass · 01/04/2013 11:37

Nothing you can do. You are not the Relationship Police and it isn't really any of your business to interfere.

Report
M0naLisa · 01/04/2013 12:08

I think I'm just gunna have to be there for her when/if it all does come out

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.