I'm thinking of trying it. Things have been off for a year or two. Dh is not abusive - things have just gone cold between us. I haven't get very far trying to talk to dh - doesn't really respond - I'm not sure if he really takes it in. I fatantasize increasingly about leaving and our dd is my main reason for staying. I'm also not sure if I'm more tired of life generally and my marriage is just collateral damage.
If your DH is uncooperative there's nothing to stop you talking to Relate or another counsellor individually. Out of interest, why do you think your DD deserves to be raised in a home where her parents are 'cold' towards each other?
We did relate councelling about 6 years ago. It was after the birth of our first child.
We were incredibly angry with each other. For various, valid reasons. We actually decided to split up and said that we would give it one last go by going to councelling. It was the best decision we ever made.
BUT... we were both willing to try. We kind of needed a referee between us who listened to both our arguments and made us listen (and take in) the other's arguments.
It taught us how to communicate properly. 6 Years later and we are still happily married and still take heed of what we learned back then.
It's possible only if you both want to. Otherwise I'd suggest doing it on your own and taking it from there.