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Partner moved out yesterday, I'm distraught. We have a daughter. Help me cope please

(84 Posts)
Oxen Sun 24-Mar-13 19:07:02

Just that really.
He moved out yesterday, we ended our relationship 2 weeks ago, he's gone to live with his mum and I'm really struggling.
We were together for 5 years and we have a 2 yr old daughter, I moved 250 miles away from everything I knew to be with him and now he's gone and I'm here on my own with our daughter.
I can't move back home as she needs to see her dad and I don't want to make their relationship difficult. I also have a good job and she's in a really good nursery.
Even though I instigated this after our argument on mothers day I still have this hole in my stomach, I feel empty and alone and the thought of him not loving me anymore is unbearable at this stage.
What are the next steps for me? How can I keep motivated and happy for the sake of our daughter? How the hell do I cope?
Thanks in advance.

DotCottonsHairnet Mon 25-Mar-13 20:46:48

Brandy he sounds a right prat/user - sorry.

Well my H has just been round to collect one teen to go to a hobby they share.

I managed cool, calm and collected. Discussed stuff we needed to - house sale. Also plans to draw up a formal financial arrangement between us. Then I scored a blow - asked him to take a bag of his clothes I removed from MY bedroom and told him he can collect more stuff and some bits of furniture this weekend. Basically I was in charge for a change knew what I wanted. Felt good to be a bit strong and know what I want ;)

Oxen Mon 25-Mar-13 20:48:53

Seems like a lot of bad stuff there. Much similar to my situ, albeit he's great with dd and was SAHD for her first year. All the bad stuff, he does to me but somehow I allow it and want him back!

You don't need him in your life or your kids for that matter. There's a lot of negative things going on in that relationship. Tell me, does he switch the charm on easily, make you doubt yourself? You're doing the right thing you know, what day are you on and how often do you see him since the split?

Oxen Mon 25-Mar-13 20:50:06

Well done Dot! That's amazing! Good girl smile

BeingAWifeIsNotForMe Mon 25-Mar-13 21:08:11

Another old gimmer here dd1 is 20 dd2 is 3.

Brandy I might have the wrong end of the stick, but reading a previous post I wondered if you are in the south west?

Oxen (((((((((((((hug)))))))))))) have as many as you need.

InNeedOfBrandy Mon 25-Mar-13 21:29:33

He is and he does! It's like a light switch the way he switches his charm off and on. He even makes his eyes twinkle on command ffs. He twists everything around in my head so I end up thinking well what was I making a fuss about in the first place and I'm the one who needs to stop moaning and start being grateful for what I do have. I actually believe(d) that I should show him I appreciate what he does for me and the dc more. Argh I am a twat sometimes what was I thinking, sure he is all fur coat and no knickers really. (but tiny voice in my head saying well he is on hard times atm and if you just stick by him things will get better and change)

Thanks for this thread OP glad to get it all out!

beingawife I am why?

BeingAWifeIsNotForMe Mon 25-Mar-13 21:44:00

Have pm'd you.

InNeedOfBrandy Mon 25-Mar-13 21:58:00

OP it's only been since wednesday, but thats almost a week although he did stay over friday night cos I am a twat

I JUST WANT MY HAPPY EVER AFTER FFS sad and the white picket fence.

BeingAWifeIsNotForMe Mon 25-Mar-13 22:10:41

Nothing wrong in wanting that Brandy

Achieving it however seems to be nigh on impossible sad

InNeedOfBrandy Mon 25-Mar-13 22:14:40


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