I think I know it is but I need to hear it from external sources, and need to understand why.
I'm going to be brutally honest below - I have received a lot of help and support on the boards re the fling in the past.
DH and I have been through a rough patch. TTC unsuccessfully for a year, I then had a brief 'fling' with someone I work with (such a bloody cliche), I immediately sought individual counselling to discuss why I had done such a thing, I spoke honestly with DH about his own behaviour in our relationship some of which has also been appalling, 7 months on we are rebuilding our relationship and in couple counselling which has been great. I am more aware of both of our faults and needs, and at the moment I'm looking forward to a future with DH that a few months ago I thought was impossible.
We stopped the TTC in the circumstances, as is of course sensible, but now things are looking up I am desperate to start again for a few reasons. Firstly I want to 'cement' the relationship with DH that has been rocky in the recent past, secondly, my age/situation just mean my biological urges are strong, and thirdly (and this is the worst reason) I still work with the colleague and he has made it clear he is interested in me. On some level I want to send a message to him that anything between us is definitely over and that my DH and I have a future together.
Please help me - I know how stupid I'm being but I'm feeling desperate. The year of unsuccessful TTC has terrified me that if/when we ever try again it may not work for a long time or at all.
To me it seems like a baby might give DH and I something to bring us closer together, something to look forward to, a solid future. I am an idiot, I know this...
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Is having a baby such a bad thing to help rebuild a troubled relationship?
TheCatAndTheFiddle · 15/03/2013 09:25
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